


The Final Rose

by bilgegungoren00



Series: eres la única para mi [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: A little bit of fluff, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst, F/M, Humans AU, Love, that bachelor AU no one asked for
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-10
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2018-12-26 00:36:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 27,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12047646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bilgegungoren00/pseuds/bilgegungoren00
Summary: He couldn’t believe how something that felt so right could’ve happened at such a wrong time, but… That was the thing with him, wasn’t it? Whenever he thought he could be happy, whenever he thought he wouldn’t lose it, the rug was pulled right from underneath him.Or, in which Mon-El falls for Kara on the Bachelor, but not everything goes as he planned.Bachelor AU





	1. Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> Hey y'all!!!
> 
> Okay, so, I'm pretty sure most of you are thinking, "OMG A BACHELOR AU??? WHAT THE HELL???" aaaaand I can assure you, that was my first reaction when I came up with this. Bachelor and Bachelorette has always been a guilty pleasure of mine, the kind of thing I loved to hate and watched for the laughs of it (seriously, it's so fake that it's funny), so when I found an episode of it on TV the other day........it sparked an idea. And the idea rooted in my brain, grew, and before I even realized it it was a huge damn tree and I had to write it. Sue me. Lol.
> 
> Buttttt still, I hope you give this a chance, and....... I hope you like it, I guess? :)

                               

Mon-El felt absolutely exhausted. He could feel the slowness in his movements as he walked around the kitchen, trying to gather up the ingredients—was the flour in the third or fourth cabinet?—to make pancakes…and failing, considerably. Not that it was much surprising, because _of course_ with his blurry vision he’d mistake salt as sugar.

Though he had to admit, that blurriness had nothing to do with his sleeplessness. It was the damn _tears_ that refused to leave his eyes. It was like he had an endless supply of them. That was the only explanation he could think of as to how he could _still_ have them after hours of crying the previous night _and_ this morning.

It had been a miracle that he even got out of bed. He deserved a pat in the back for that.

He sighed as he dumped the flour into the bowl, mixing it with sugar and baking powder. He’d hoped that he remembered the measurements right, because he really didn’t feel like getting his phone and looking up the recipe. Besides, he was a good cook. Even in the…shitty…situation he was in.

He shouldn’t have watched the Bachelor episode from the previous night. He knew that. In fact, he spent a week convincing himself of all the reasons _why_ he shouldn’t watch it. It wouldn’t do anything other than hurting him. It was the episode in which he’d lost everything. The episode that…that Kara left him.

Of course he knew it wasn’t her fault, and after seeing it from her perspective he’d seen how hard it had been for her too, but that didn’t mean it didn’t break his heart. He’d lost the woman that he loved—the woman that he thought he’d get engaged to. How could it not hurt?

He shook away those thoughts as he grabbed another bowl to beat the eggs in…the _egg_ in. He was pretty sure that it was one egg.

Oh well. Maybe he wasn’t that much of a good cook.

He pinched his nose for a couple of moments, trying to pull himself together and actually function properly. As if he’d been doing that even before he watched Kara leaving all over again. He’d been hoping, once the Bachelor was over and he came back home, he’d manage to return back to his old routine. Since Kara had never been a part of that routine…he shouldn’t miss her, right? He might’ve loved her, yes, but he could move on once the situation that he loved her in ended. Oh how wrong he’d been. Not only he missed her _so damn much every single day_ , but he was constantly thinking how much better life could’ve been if she was by his side. He couldn’t help seeing her dancing around the kitchen in the mornings with one of his t-shirts on her, or curled up under a blanket on the couch watching TV, or pulling him close as they slept, resting her head on his chest and wrapping an arm around his waist. He saw her in every aspect of his life, wishing that all of it had been real.

So it was fair to say that no, he absolutely hadn’t moved on with his life.

He was distracted from his thoughts when, from the corner of his eyes, he saw Good Morning America start on TV. He’d turned it on just so that it would create some noise, but the moment the host came on… He realized he’d made a really bad choice.

“Now to the news from ABC’s hit reality show, the Bachelor. In the shocking episode last night, just one week short of the finale, the fan-favorite Kara Danvers leaves the show, breaking the internet and, I can confidently say, the whole America’s heart.” Mon-El dropped the whisk in the bowl after those words, trying to ignore the tightness in his chest. He moved to the already oiled pan on the stove.

“Well, at least I’m not the only one,” he couldn’t help muttering under his breath. In fact, he was pretty sure that even _the whole America’s_ heartbreak couldn’t match up with his. They were heartbroken over a couple they didn’t even know. He had actually lost Kara.

He huffed out a breath in an attempt to pull himself together and poured the first two batches of the pancake dough over the pan, blinking away his tears so that he could make sure they were ready to be flipped. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn’t stop himself from listening to the TV.

“Let’s watch the tear-jerking moment once again.” _As if the first time wasn’t enough._

He flipped the pancakes quickly, feeling himself getting weighed down by something. He wasn’t looking at the TV—he didn’t think he could get through the day if he watched Kara’s departure once again. Yet still…he could hear it. He could hear the silent sniffs, and the quiet words—the words that were still circling his mind even months after the actual event happened. He couldn’t stop himself from overanalyzing…and each time he went through what happened, he found yet _another way_ of how he could still be with Kara. Damn the show. He _should’ve_ been with Kara.

He was so wrapped around his thoughts that he didn’t realize the pancakes were burning until it was too late. “Shoot.” He jumped into action and grabbed the spatula, but he’d miscalculated, and instead of its handle it was _his hand_ that hit the side of the pan. He felt the sensation of the burn spread through his arm, even causing him to drop the spatula… _right over the pan with the overcooked pancakes._ “Shit, shit, shit,” he muttered as he realized he had no choice but to turn the heat on. “Shit.”

It took him a couple of seconds to get himself sorted out, keeping his hand under the cold water to lessen the burning as he tried to remember whether there was ice in the fridge. He usually kept a tray of ice cubes just in case, but he’d been so distracted lately that he might’ve forgotten to refill it with water.

Damn it, he’d been distracted all the time. The pancake disaster just proved that. He was a meticulous cook. He rarely caused accidents in the kitchen, and even then it was about the ingredients rather than his clumsiness. He wasn’t clumsy…okay, he didn’t _use_ to be clumsy. But right now, it seemed like all he did was mess up.

He furiously wiped away a couple of tears that escaped his eyes before turning off the water tab, moving to the fridge…to grab a bottle of beer. He didn’t even look to see if there was ice. The physical pain in his hand was actually a good distraction from the ache in his heart.

He plopped down on his couch, turning off the TV—he did not want another minute of the Bachelor bullshit. He popped open the beer and took a sip from it. He couldn’t even care about the fact that it was too early for a drink. He was a _bar owner_ for God’s sake, who had a day off. He deserved a drink.

 _I should’ve never done this._ The thought seeped into his head slowly, as it did every single day. Some days he’d discard it almost immediately—he’d met Kara on the Bachelor. How could he not do it? As sad and heartbroken he was right now, meeting her and knowing her worth it all. He honestly couldn’t remember how his life had been without her, and he didn’t want to live a life without her…the thought of her, at least. But there were some days…like this one…during which he wished he never met her. The pain of her loss would be just…just too much for him to handle that…he’d do anything to get rid of it. He’d be willing to do anything.

 _I should’ve never accepted to be the Bachelor._ Yet he’d done it. He’d done it, thinking he wouldn’t even be able to get to the end, only because his best friend, Winn, urged him to. Yet even then he believed he’d never choose anyone at the end. All that had changed when…when he met Kara. There was just…something special about her. And he’d stayed. Just for her, he’d stayed.

He didn’t know that it would cause him the worse heartbreak of his life.

* * *

This was a terrible idea _, Mon-El couldn’t help thinking as he watched the first limo approach the infamous Bachelor mansion._ Infamous _, he was saying, because after twenty plus seasons of the Bachelor, and only_ one _Bachelor couple making it to marriage and, well, beyond, he honestly couldn’t help thinking the place was cursed or something. Hence, the terrible idea part._

I should’ve never done this. The Bachelorette either _._ I should’ve never even attempted this _. He sighed at that thought. Oh, how he wished he could return back the time and not get into that bet with his best friend, Winn. He always claimed that it was past time Mon-El fell in love and get married, being almost thirty years old. And since he himself had actually managed to find the love of his life on the Bachelorette—it was still hard for him to believe Winn and Eve actually met on a TV_ _show, seeing how in love they were even after years of marriage and having a kid—why couldn’t he do the same thing, right? He had been urging for him to sign up for the show for some time now, and at one point, Mon-El had gotten so frustrated with it that he told him he would sign up for it if he wasn’t in a relationship in a year. Winn was_ so _down for it that when a year passed he was the one that signed Mon-El up before Mon-El could do anything about it._

_But of course, the last thing they both considered was the fact that he might actually make it to the last few people, and then get selected to be the next Bachelor. The audience had loved him, apparently. And, well, he was truly unlucky that he was with Winn when the producers came with the offer._

_And that was how he’d ended up here, waiting for about 30 girls to come out of the limos so that he could meet them, and hopefully at the end of this nine week journey he’d fall in love and propose to one. It sounded so ridiculous that he wanted to laugh. Falling in love and deciding to get engaged nine weeks into a relationship was already a laughable idea, especially for him since he usually took things slow, and adding_ twenty nine other women _into the mix… It seemed impossible. He wouldn’t be surprised if he was the first Bachelor ever to not choose anyone at the end of a season. Well, okay, according to Winn there_ had been _another one, but apparently he got a second season and did choose someone at the end of it, so that didn’t count._

 _He took a deep breath and huffed out the air as the limo stopped in front of her._ Here we go _, he thought, truly hoping that the smile on his face looked real enough. And despite everything—how ridiculous this was, how it shouldn’t be working and hasn’t worked well in the past anyway, how he’d rather be almost anywhere other than here—he found a teeny tiny part of herself hoping that maybe, just maybe this might work. Life was surprising and full of coincidences. Who said that the love of his life wasn’t among the girls coming here?_

_At least he truly hoped so. He was a soulmate type of guy, believing that everyone had one perfect match. And that person being here was really unlikely, but… You never knew._

_That was the thought he held onto as the first girl left the limo, starting this whole crazy and ridiculous journey. And then…it was like the plug was pulled. It was girl after girl coming out of the limos, wearing all different kinds of dresses, meeting him. Fleur, Dana, Robin, Kelsey, Brooklyn… It was hard keeping up with the names. He knew that the one with ridiculously blond hair and a braid was Dana. Kelsey was wearing a green sequin dress, and Brooklyn… Yes, she was the one matching her red hair with a burgundy colored gown, looking like wine in a champagne glass. Well, she_ was _tall._

 _He was trying to get the names of ten plus girls correct, as well as watching the last girl getting out of the limo. He saw a flash of red gown and black stilettos. He truly_ _hoped his shoulders didn’t look too slumped as he took a deep breath. He already felt overwhelmed. A smile that he hoped didn’t look so fake pulled his lips as a blond girl appeared from behind the limo’s door. He’d seen the tail of the gown getting stuck under the girl’s shoe about a second before she stepped forward, and by then there was nothing he could’ve done to prevent what happened anyway._

 _She stumbled over her dress, almost falling forward if not for her tight grip on the limo’s door, and her gown barely escaped being torn. He couldn’t help it as a laugh escaped his lips, no matter how much he tried to clamp it down. It was just… It was just so cute. But it was more than that. Normally, in a situation like that, he would manage to keep his composure, and as Winn said, be a gentleman. But he was exhausted. His head was already jumbled with girls’ names and all the different faces, how he had to keep his composure and make this thing interesting enough for the viewers of the show. He was so overwhelmed that this…this girl stumbling over her dress so…so_ normally _was almost like a breath of fresh air. A sense of normalcy in all the craziness._

_Still, he pressed his lips together as the girl straightened up, not wanting to embarrass her. He didn’t know how he expected her to look like. Ashamed? Ignoring what just happened? Trying to play it off as nothing? But he was definitely not ready for her keeping her composure, pushing her blond curls away from her face, and fixing her angry glare at him. Her blue eyes—even in the night air they looked bright like comets on a dark sky—almost icy._

_“Don’t you dare laugh,” she said threateningly as she moved forward. His brows inched to his forehead. He’d seen all kinds of greetings from all the different girls that day, and when Winn made him watch the show occasionally, but this…this was new. New and so…so real. Maybe it sounded unbelievable with all the cameras around, or when he remembered the fact that he was on a reality show, but this girl… She just radiated normalcy. She radiated_ realness _._

_He could see, once she stepped into the light, that her cheeks had flushed as crimson as her gown. “You have no idea how hard it is to walk in these stilettos and gown,” she continued. It only worked to widen Mon-El’s grin._

_And for the first time throughout the night, when she stopped in front of him and looked at him through her lashes, he felt something flutter in his chest. For the first time smiling didn’t feel so hard. The corner of his lips kicked up as he nodded, his eyes traveling down her figure._

_“Yeah, I can see that,” he admitted with a nod, earning another glare from her. He found himself shrugging almost nonchalantly. “But, you know, you could’ve come in jeans and a t-shirt. I wouldn’t mind.”_

_Hell, at this point, he might’ve given everything for someone to walk out in jeans and a t-shirt and even no makeup on. Maybe it would lessen the “fakeness” of all of this._

_The girl huffed and rolled her eyes at that, and he sensed that his words hit a sensitive spot. “I wish. That was actually my plan,” she pointed out. “But tell that to my_ sister _. She’s the one that forced me in this ridiculous red gown.” She pulled at her dress, looking obviously uncomfortable, so much so that Mon-El couldn’t help thinking she must not have been used to wearing something so tight…and revealing too, because that neckline and cleavage… That slit on the skirt… Damn, she looked good in it. He hoped the heat he felt in his cheeks wasn’t showing outwardly as a blush._

_“Well, remind me to thank her for it if I meet her,” he couldn’t help saying. He watched the girl’s cheeks flushing to that sweet, pink color. Even as she rolled her eyes. But then…then her red lips curled into a smile, not an overly bright one but a small, shy one, and suddenly he felt her chest tighten. He was once again reminded that she was beautiful, despite her shy, blunt, and uncomfortable behavior. She was obviously so outside her element—as he felt like—yet still… He couldn’t help thinking she was exactly what he needed right now. Someone who almost recognized, just like him, how ridiculous this situation was._

_“I’m Kara, by the way. Kara Danvers,” she said, obviously not knowing what to do with her hands. He offered her a smile too, a reassuring one._

_“Mon-El Matthews,” he said. He didn’t let himself think as he stepped forward, opening his arms. He pulled her into a hug. He’d been hugged by so many girls that night—usually_ they _were the ones pulling him close before he could even get a word out—that this time, seeing this girl—_ Kara _, he thought. A beautiful name—being shy about it as everyone in normal life probably would be, was refreshing. Maybe that was why he wanted to hug her._

_Or he just wanted to be close to her. That could be it too. He was man enough to admit that._

_He felt her arms around him only a couple of seconds later, as if she wasn’t sure she was doing it right. He couldn’t help smiling. He kept his hands on her bare arms as he pulled back, looking down at her. “Nice to meet you, Kara.”_

_He couldn’t help wondering how it was possible for someone to look so damn hot and so damn cute at the same time, but, well… Kara was totally rocking that adorable hotness right now. She smiled at him and nodded. “You too,” she admitted. “I mean, technically I knew you—well, not in person but like on the Bachelorette…not that you probably want to be reminded of that— What I mean is…” She shook her head when she realized she was making a mess out of her words. But it only made him smile. “I’m glad I got to meet you face to face. I’m glad you’re the…Bachelor.” She flashed him an awkward smile, a smile that made something flutter in his chest._

_He held onto that feeling even as he shook his head. “I’m glad you’re here too,” he confessed…and he realized how right that was. He was so glad someone like her_ _was on the show. Even it didn’t turn out to be anything in the end, it at least made him feel a bit more comfortable briefly. A bit more…grounded._

_He had to change the topic when he realized they were almost reaching the end of their time. He couldn’t help feeling disappointed as he cleared his throat. He could stay here with her and talk all night._

_“So… I’ll see you on the inside?” he asked, hoping he didn’t sound too…hopeful. But she just smiled at him brightly, effortlessly._

_“Yes, of course. I’ll… I’ll be waiting…inside.” She tucked her hair behind her ear almost awkwardly as she pulled back. “And it was nice to meet you…again.”_

_“Yeah,” he could only whisper as he watched her turn around and walk inside, waving dazedly behind her. Even as the next limo approached he was looking at the house and the door she disappeared behind._

_And for once… He didn’t feel so pessimistic about all of this. For once… He thought it could actually work._

* * *

Mon-El’s eye fell on the rose resting on the counter right next to the—now turned off—TV. The rose in the color of the dress Kara wore that first night…and tripped on. A smile pulled his lips despite everything. She’d looked so beautiful in that gown, but somehow, real too. She was so out of her comfort zone, it was blatantly obvious, and that was what he liked about her. All those other girls… They seemed like they were born in gowns and high heels. They looked so comfortable that it came off as fake, as a façade to get his attention. But Kara… She’d displayed right from the beginning that she liked being casual, that she’d very much rather kick back and relax in jeans and a t-shirt than sport gowns and stilettos.

Just like how he probably would rather spend a night. Just something casual with someone he liked, nothing too extravagant. And that was probably why he’d given her the first impression rose when the time came. Because she was casual. Because she was real. Because…she was the only girl he looked forward to talking to the whole night.

* * *

_Mon-El took a deep breath as he balanced the two champagne glasses in his hands, hoping it wasn’t too obvious that his hands were shaking. But he couldn’t help himself, especially as he watched the blond girl sitting not too far away from him, in a secluded corner of the bachelor mansion. He’d been looking for her through the whole night; even as girls constantly pulled him away from each other to talk, his eyes gazed around for a brief flash of red gown, blond curls, or blue eyes. And finally—_ finally _—he’d managed to find her, alone, without any other girl in sight, which he hoped would allow them to have a nice, long, uninterrupted conversation._

_He adjusted his suit jacket to make sure the “first impression rose” wasn’t too obviously in the inside pocket—he’d picked it up before coming for Kara, some part of him urging him to do so—before he moved to her side. It was well into the night, full of brief conversations with almost all the girls, the place buzzing with chatter every second of every minute, and honestly… He was reveling in silence. And the company of the blond girl that felt like the realest thing in the whole place._

_“Kara?” he called her name as he stood by the couch. He was impressed that he remembered it—well, okay, that was a lie. For him to_ remember _it, he must have_ forgotten _it in the first place, which…hadn’t happened. And yet, still, surprise splashed on Kara’s face as she looked up. But not one of those fake kind of surprises that he saw on many girls’ face that night, just to seem more sympathetic or something. It was real. She seemed honestly baffled that he came for her._

_A smile pulled his lips as he stepped forward, right in front of the couch, watching her eyes follow him. “May I…?” He gestured at the couch._

_She nodded hastily, opening her mouth, yet she seemed to be unable to form words. And there it was—that blush on her cheeks that made his chest flutter. His gaze traveled on her cheeks, taking that in for a couple of seconds, before he looked up at her eyes. He cleared her throat; he felt almost awkward for the first time. Being a bar owner-slash-bartender, he had to be a good conversationalist, always filling the stretched silences and keep the chatter—and hopefully alcohol, for business’ sake—going. Yet now…looking at the eyes of this shy girl—shy, but an open book too, as all her feelings was reflected on her expression—he felt at a loss of words._

_He racked his brain to find something to say. “I, um, I was looking for you,” he muttered, with a clear of his throat. “At some point I’d thought you ran away or something.”_

_“…you were looking for me?” He couldn’t help chuckling at her astonished expression and nodded._

_“Yeah, is that—is that weird?” Oh, he so hoped that wasn’t the case. This whole thing was weird enough, and Kara looked almost uncomfortable of all of it; the last thing he wanted was to bother her more._

_Yet she rushed forward quickly—almost fearfully—at his words. “No! No, that…that wasn’t what I meant. I just…” Her eyes flickered to anywhere but him, a crinkle forming on her forehead—he begun to realize she crinkled a lot when she felt under pressure—as she continued. He somehow thought that made her only cuter. “I just thought you were too busy, you know, being pulled from one girl to another.” She hastily explained when she saw him arch his brow. “This place does offer some good vantage point.” She waved at the mansion…and he realized she_ was _right. He could see the girls milling around and—_

_Was that brunette girl—he was pretty sure her name was Madelyn—arguing with Cha…Char…Charlene?_

_He ignored that, deciding he didn’t even want to be involved in that, as he turned to Kara. “Well, you’ve chosen yourself a good place,” he said, not being able to be impressed. “Hidden away from sight so no one can bother you, but having the perfect view of everything going on. All you lack is popcorn.” A bubble of pride flickered in his chest when that earned a laugh from Kara. She shrugged almost matter-of-factly, even as a strand of her hair fell over her forehead. She didn’t even seem bothered, yet still, Mon-El felt a sudden urge to push it away and stroke her cheek. He was glad for the champagne’s in his hand, or else, he might’ve actually done that._

_And he didn’t know if that would be crossing boundaries or not._

_“Well, perks of being a reporter. You learn to gather the most information with the least attention.” Her eyes flickered to his hands. “Is that champagne for me?”_

_Mon-El felt almost glad she pointed that out, or else he’d forgotten even the existence of the glasses while he watched the way her lips moved as she talked. He blinked, hoping his blush wasn’t too visible, and handed her the glass._

_“Yep. I saw that you didn’t drink anything, so I thought a bit of liquid courage might help.” God knew it helped him, even though he only had time to drink one glass of champagne. He only felt slightly warm, not even close to being tipsy, let alone being drunk._

_Kara flashed him a small smile. “Well, thank you.” He watched her taking a sip from the glass, her lashes fluttering on her cheeks, before he cleared his throat and pulled himself together. Her words caught up with him only then._

_“So… You’re a reporter?” Her eyes lit up with that as she looked up and nodded. Even that little action oozed enthusiasm._

_“Yes. At CatCo Worldwide Media.” His brows arched with that._

_“_ The _CatCo?” he couldn’t help asking. “You know the one with the legendary Cat Grant, or the queen of all media?” Kara snorted with a nod._

 _“Yep, that one. And before you ask, yes, there is a reason Ms. Grant got that name, and it is not as pleasant as you might think it is.” He tried not to laugh at that—he really did—but somehow a chuckle escaped his lips. She flashed him a small smile at that. “But I love it. I mean, I didn’t_ always _want to be a reporter, but I’m glad that I got into it. I just… I love solving mysteries and uncovering truths, especially the ones people want to keep hidden. It’s fun.” She sounded so engaged talking about her job that Mon-El knew she wasn’t lying when she said she loved it. It was… It was like a tap being opened for her. She’d been shy by then mostly, saying as few words as possible, but right now… It was as if she didn’t want to stop talking._

_And he found himself not wanting her to do that. “What did you want to be when you were young?” he couldn’t help asking, urging her to continue. She offered him a small shrug._

_“Honestly, I didn’t know what I wanted to be. Not even in college. But… Well, I just loved music and movies, and I was young, and I wanted to meet a bunch of celebrities. It seemed like being a reporter was the fastest way to do that.”_

_Mon-El almost choked on his champagne when a sudden laugh escaped from his lips, almost spurting the liquid all over himself. Kara’s head whipped at him at the sound, concern pinching her brows._

_He felt her pat him on the back. “Are you okay?”_

_It took him a couple of seconds of clearing his throat to find the words. “Yes, I— Yes.” He cleared his throat again, carefully putting his glass to the side to avoid more accidents. There was no way he could miss the amused look on Kara’s face. “I just… Did you just say that you became a reporter so that you could_ meet celebrities _?” She shot him a brief glare._

_“I was young! I wasn’t really thinking! And come on, you can’t tell me that the promise of meeting celebrities isn’t alluring.” He stared at her for a couple of seconds, trying to decide whether she was being serious or not. And it seemed like she was._

_Another laugh escaped his lips, this time not stopped by champagne. He shook his head and scratched his cheek. “I think that might be the weirdest reason anyone gave me for choosing a job.” She elbowed him at his side with that…which only worked to make him laugh more._

_“Hush it,” she urged him with a glare. “It worked out at the end, isn’t it?”_

_“Well, it brought you here,” he shrugged as nonchalantly as possible. He watched as her eyes widened, the humor in the air getting replaced by something deeper, more serious. A crooked smile appeared on his face. “And I’m really glad that you’re here.”_

_He thought those might be the truest words he’d spoken the whole night. The last couple of minutes with Kara felt real—so real even with the cameras jammed in their faces that it should’ve been impossible. But…it’d happened. And the smile on his face right now… He didn’t even have to force it as he watched Kara’s lips part in surprise._

_“Oh?” He chuckled silently._

_“Yeah. In fact…” He cleared his throat, reaching for his inside pocket. He hoped she didn’t notice the way he wiped his palms to his shirt—with his fluttering heart and churning stomach, no wonder they’d gotten sweaty. He tugged the first impression rose out. “I, uh, I got this little thing here that…that might prove that.” His fingers_ _were shaking so much that it was an effort to keep the rose from shaking. He inhaled deeply before looking up at Kara, his heart feeling like it was slamming against his ribs, waiting for her reaction._

_It took her about one second to realize what was happening. And then her eyes widened even more, her hands dropping on her lap loosely. Her gaze flickered back and forth between the rose and his face._

_“The first impression rose.” She sounded almost breathless saying that. The corners of his lips kicked up._

_“Yes. And… You know what it means?” She nodded absentmindedly. “It means that you…you made an impression on me. Kara…” He pressed his lips together and looked at her, his gaze meeting with her blue eyes. They looked so deep and mysterious under the night air, yet it didn’t take anything from her beauty. “This conversation might be the realest conversation I’ve had tonight. It was just effortless, and…and easy. Normal_.” As if we aren’t on a reality show but in real life _. “And I hope you felt that way too.”_

_She seemed to snap out of her stupor with that. “Mon-El, I…” she croaked out, shaking her head. “I never thought… I thought I’d messed tonight up.” He couldn’t help frowning._

_“What do you mean?” Her hair fell over her cheeks when she ducked her chin._

_“You know, I’m not… I’m not the most assertive person when it comes to…me.” She cleared her throat uncomfortably, and with that, Mon-El couldn’t help reaching forward and putting his hand on her knee. She seemed surprised by the action at first, but then she just…smiled. One of those shy smiles of her that he so liked. “Being a reporter, jumping in front of the line to get an interview, I can do, but when it’s…me, and my feelings on the line… It’s hard. And I was watching all those girls that were pulling you into conversations, and I… I could never do that. I thought…”_

_“That you wouldn’t get to talk to me?” She bit her lip and nodded. He couldn’t help smiling at that. Her worry… It felt just so_ real _to him. Getting sidelined by others just because you weren’t vocal or assertive enough. Losing your chance just because you didn’t speak up. He’d experienced it a lot, not only in personal life but in professional life too. And somehow hearing those words from Kara, admitting she was shy… It made her even more likeable to him. Certainly more likeable than someone who’d interrupt his conversation with a girl selfishly._

 _“Not all of us can be outspoken or loud, Kara,” he continued, taking her hand in his. “That doesn’t mean we’re worse than the others, or that we aren’t worth time. In fact, I believe that the quietest people are actually the kindest.” She looked almost bewildered at those words, at least at first, but then a smile pulled her lips. Pride flickered in his chest. “And you shouldn’t have to change who you are or act like_ _someone you’re not to get someone to notice you. The right person should see you no matter what,_ especially _for who you are. They should seek you out if they see that you’re afraid to take the first step.”_

_“And you’re that right person?” she asked almost teasingly, although there was a blush on her cheeks. He couldn’t help laughing at the joke, even as his heart skipped a beat._

_“Well, I truly hope so. Because I…I want to be that person for you. And I want you to know that you never have to pretend to be someone you’re not with me. You…just be your real, normal self.” He flashed her a smile. “In your t-shirts and jeans.” A laugh escaped her lips and reverberated through him._

_“In my t-shirts and jeans then,” she agreed with a nod, and then fixed her eyes on him. “I’ll hold you to that promise.”_

_“Good.”_ Honestly, Kara, I’d notice you, gowns or jeans, promises or not _. “Good.” He hoped that his tone expressed the thoughts he couldn’t voice out loud._

_He cleared his throat as he lifted the first impression rose again. “That said, Kara,” he started, offering her a smile, “will you accept this rose?” She didn’t even hesitate as she mirrored his smile and nodded._

_“Yes. Yes, of course I will.” She grabbed the rose gingerly, as if it was the most precious thing for her in the world, before reaching forward and pulling him into a hug. The move was so unexpected that air got hitched in his throat, yet still… He didn’t move back. He didn’t want to move back. Instead he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tighter into his embrace, reveling in the feeling of being in her arms—of having her in his arms._

_She pulled back a couple of seconds—almost too soon, yet her empty hand was still on his shoulder. She was smiling at him, her red lips curled up. He found himself staring._

_He wanted to kiss her._

_The urge hit him hard. He wanted to lean forward and press his lips on hers, he wanted to capture her lower lip between his teeth, he wanted to fit her body into his and hold her right then and there as long as he could. He’d never felt anything like that with any of the other girls in the mansion._

_And if it was any other girl, he would’ve done it. He was pretty sure they’d be willing too, for being kissed by “the bachelor”. But…this was Kara. The shy girl who couldn’t gather the nerve to come up to him and talk to him. The quiet girl who rarely liked to talk about herself. She wasn’t just any other girl, and he knew… He knew she would want to take things slow. Especially in a situation like this. She wouldn’t want to rush anything._

_Weirdly, he found himself wishing the same thing. He wanted to do this right. They were already walking a thin, dangerous line here, and any wrong move could throw them off balance. That was the last thing he’d want._

_So instead he opted to smile at her, taking her hand into his and lacing their fingers together. He just wanted to enjoy this moment—being with her—a little bit more, because they were bound to be interrupted sooner rather than later._

_Yet even when that happened, he couldn’t help looking back and thinking a piece of him stayed back to her, in that rose she was clinging to oh-so-tightly._

* * *

Mon-El could feel the tears brimming in his eyes as he trailed his fingers over the photo in the album. He’d gathered up the pictures—well, screenshot them from the show until they were perfect—after the show. Pictures of him and Kara, or Kara alone, whatever he could find, and put them all in the album. He kept it tucked away in a drawer most of the time, at least…when he didn’t feel like the world around him was falling apart. When he didn’t need _her_ by his side.

He flipped the page when he saw a tear falling over the album, instead trying to focus on the next picture. His heart ached when he came face to face with one from their karaoke group date, Kara singing on the stage, her eyes closed as if she knew the song by heart and didn’t need to look at the screen. Well maybe she did, because she could’ve never sung that song so beautifully and emotionally if she wasn’t prepared. Her voice was…magical. He didn’t even know how else to describe it. Just…magical, so much so that when you heard it, you felt like you were transported into another realm. A realm in which everything was right.

And despite it being months after the karaoke date, Mon-El could still hear her voice in his ears.

* * *

_Mon-El had become quite good at noticing little things about Kara recently. Well, not that it was any surprising. Of course he’d learn her little quirks if he spent all of his downtime, especially at cocktail parties, group dates, and rose ceremonies, watching her. But it wasn’t his fault! He just… He just seemed to be unable to keep his eyes off of her. She was just… She was everything. She was bright, she was lovely, she was kind, and caring, and had this…this really contagious smile that always brought a flutter to his chest, but most of all… She was real. Never once in the show she pretended to be someone else, not like all the other girls, and he loved that about her so much that he found himself gravitating towards her, all the time._

_He should’ve felt guilty about it, he knew, yet as he watched Kara from his position on the couch… He couldn’t help thinking that it might’ve paid off. Because she had been fidgeting throughout the group date, right from the moment he_ _explained they’d be going to a karaoke bar. Like right now, she was nervously biting her lip, watching Brooklyn sing an upbeat song that sounded a lot like a mixture between Miley Cyrus and Katy Perry…which was probably the whole pop genre, though, so he had no idea what it was. Besides, there were other things in his mind._

_Like what could’ve happened to Kara that put her in such an uncomfortable situation. Had he said something wrong? He was trying to be very careful around her, not to offend or irritate her in any way. But…this was a reality TV show, so anything that he said might trigger a reaction he hadn’t intended._

_He was truly hoping that wasn’t the case._

_Kara played with her fingers again, twirling one of them around the hem of her shorts…and that was the last straw. Mon-El moved himself out of the Fleur-Kelsey sandwich, excusing himself, and sat next to her. She jumped when she noticed him._

_“Oh God,” she said, shutting her eyes and pressing her hand over her chest. “You scared me.” He couldn’t help chuckling at her absolutely horrified expression._

_“Sorry,” he whispered, not wanting to distract Brooklyn—or any of the other girls—from her performance. “I just saw that you were…a bit uncomfortable…and wanted to ask you if you were okay or not.” He flashed her a smile. “I really care about your well-being.”_

_She rolled her eyes at him very openly. “Ha ha.” It only worked to widen his smile. “Thank you for that, but I…I’m fine. I’m okay.”_

_“Yeah, that crinkle on your forehead says otherwise.” Kara almost froze with that and her eyes snapped at him._

_“I don’t have a crinkle.”_

_“Yeah… You kinda do—“_

_“I don’t—“_

_“It’s right here.” He was just about to point at her forehead when she swatted his hand away. She fixed a hard gaze on him._

_“I don’t have a crinkle,” she said, emphasizing every syllable, so much so that Mon-El stopped insisting. Yet there was an amused grin on his face, a grin that made Kara elbow him._

_It still dissipated when her crinkle deepened and the anger in her eyes transformed into something like…fear? She turned her eyes to the stage, where Brooklyn was still singing. Damn, that must’ve been one long song._

_“I’ve never sung in public before,” she said, dropping the information seemingly unexpectedly, yet from the way her shoulders slumped and she nibbled with her lower lip, Mon-El immediately understood that it was what she was uncomfortable_ _about. “I mean, I’ve sung to my family occasionally, and everyone kind of sings in the shower, but I’ve never really…sung…in front of everyone.”_

_He moved his hand to hold hers. “You know, it’s not that different than singing in the shower,” he pointed out, earning a glare from her. “I mean, plus the audience of course.”_

_“You’re not really helping right now.”_

_“Sorry.” It probably would’ve sounded much more believable if not for the grin on his face. And it seemed like Kara had noticed that too. She rolled her eyes with a sigh and tried to turn away…_

_At least Mon-El stopped her by putting a hand on her knee. “You’ll do great, Kara,” he said, getting rid of all the sarcasm and jokes in his voice. She looked at him in surprise, only to see him smile. “Don’t worry. I bet you put the Kara in karaoke… Okay, that was a bad pun,” he had to admit when her expression turned into an incredulous one._

_“You don’t say,” she muttered under her breath. The corners of Mon-El’s lips kicked up at that, yet still, he tried to suppress his smile as he continued._

_“What I was trying to say was that… It’ll be fine. You’ll be fine. It’s for fun anyway, not a singing competition. And if you do get nervous… Just look in my eyes and pretend I’m the only one in the room.” She narrowed her eyes at him._

_“Yeah, I don’t think so. You being in the room part is making me nervous,” she hissed between her teeth, rubbing her palms together. She looked so adorable that Mon-El couldn’t help laughing. He knew he probably shouldn’t find her nervousness adorable, but damn it, he thought everything Kara did was cute, and this was no exception._

_“Well, then, pretend I don’t exist,” he said, putting a hand on her shoulder and rubbing it encouragingly. She looked up at him slowly, her eyes wide, but then… A small smile begun to spread on her face. A smile that made Mon-El’s stomach flutter with butterflies._

_That was probably why he noticed too late that Brooklyn had finished singing and was even standing in front of him._

_“Mon-El?” she said, clearing his throat, and only then he turned his head. Brooklyn’s brow was raised and her arms were crossed over her chest. She looked_ pissed off _. “I finished singing, like, half a minute ago. If you haven’t realized that.”_

_Oh no. He was so wrapped up in talking with Kara that he forgot to even clap for her or compliment her. Damn. What was it about this girl that somehow made him forget everything?_

_He really needed to get himself together._

_“Um, yeah, yeah, I know,” he tried to play it off and cleared his throat. “You were great, Brooklyn.” He was hoping the compliment didn’t fall flat, yet from the way Brooklyn scoffed and rolled her eyes before moving to the far end of the couch, he knew he didn’t succeed._

_An awkward silence filled the room as he ducked his chin and pinched his nose. It wasn’t as if he was trying to be rude on purpose. He didn’t mean to lose himself in his conversation with Kara. He just thought she looked nervous and wanted to cheer her up. Yet when they started talking…_

_He didn’t seem to get enough of it._

_He only looked up when he felt Kara’s hand over his shoulder. She offered him an apologetic smile, even though she didn’t really have anything to be sorry about, before inching forward on the couch._

_“Well, it seems like it’s my turn.” Her voice cut through the silence. Mon-El felt almost stunned when he watched her stand up, despite her shaky hands and obvious nerves, and walked up to the stage. He had no doubt that what she just did mustn’t have come easy to her. She hated awkward silences, yes, but she’d confessed that she really wasn’t that good at solving them either. But she’d just stepped up, distracting the room, for_ him _. That small rub on his shoulder and her understanding look… It said it all._

_One corner of his lips kicked up gratefully as he looked up and watched her pick the song. She had her brows furrowed as she went through the list. He was so focused on her that he didn’t even notice the girls murmuring among themselves, which no doubt would make it to the TV cut. The Bachelor did love its drama._

_Kara straightened up a couple of seconds later, taking a deep breath and moving to the microphone. He offered her an encouraging smile and thumbs up when their eyes met, knowing that no matter how bad or good_ _her performance would be, he’d still stay by her._

_The song started a couple of seconds later as Kara turned to the front, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. A soft piano melody and guitar rhythm filled the room. Mon-El’s brows inched up. Kara had chosen a slow song._

_Not that she couldn’t, but all the other girls had chosen upbeat pop songs; you know, the ones that cloaked out-of-tune voices at least to a degree. Besides, even if you couldn’t sing, you could always have fun with an upbeat song. They were about having fun after all—_

Clock strikes upon the hour  
And the sun begins to fade  
Still enough time to figure out  
How to chase my blues away

 _All thoughts disappeared from Mon-El’s head the moment Kara’s voice filled the room. He was pretty sure that his mouth had dropped open even. He’d blinked several times to make sure that he wasn’t dreaming, that this was actually happening, Kara was singing in front of her in that…that_ incredible _voice of hers. She was so_ incredible _that it was hard to wrap her mind about it. Enough to make him wonder why hadn’t she chosen singing as a career. She was that good._

I’ve done alright up ‘til now  
It’s the light of day that shows me how  
And when the night falls  
Loneliness calls

 _Why had she worried about singing in the first place? If he had a voice like hers, damn, he’d be singing whenever he had free time. And the song she chose… A slow version of_ I Wanna Dance With Somebody _, if he was correct. He guessed it must’ve been a cover of it or something, but it was…amazing. And it_ fit _her voice just so well that a part of him wondered if there was someone behind her, behind the scenes, that was singing the song and not her._

_Yet that wasn’t the case. It was just Kara—his Kara—being her amazing self._

I've been in love and lost my senses  
Spinning through the town  
Sooner or later the fever ends  
And I wind up feeling down  
I need a man who'll take a chance  
On a love that burns hot enough to last  
So when the night falls  
My lonely heart calls

 _He was mesmerized. Stunned. Frozen at…at her beauty, at her lyrical voice, at how her performance just came together perfectly as if it was_ magic _. Yes, it was almost_ magical _, how in the moment she was and how she was conveying not just the meaning of the lyrics, but the emotions behind them. It was like the beginning of a fairytale: the promise of tears, adventure, heartbreak, happiness, and most of all…love._ Love _. The song choice, the words, the movement of her lips and her closed eyes, they all promised love._ Love _._

_He loved her._

Oh, I wanna dance with somebody  
I wanna feel the heat with somebody  
Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody  
With somebody who loves me

_He loved her. He loved her. He loved her._

_The words circled his head over and over again, so foreign as he had never felt anything like that in his life before, yet also so familiar because he_ felt _it deep inside him, inside his heart, all the way to his core and back. He felt it all over himself. It just… It just clicked at that moment; everything fell into place, like pieces of a puzzle. You couldn’t make sense of it at first, until you put all the pieces together and looked at the whole picture. Now he was looking at the whole picture and… He loved her. That was why he gravitated towards her whenever he saw her around. That was why he wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. That was why he sought her out whenever he needed someone, and even went far enough to plead with the producers for it. That was why he forgot everything and everyone when she was concerned. He loved her. He’d actually, truly, completely fallen in love with her._

_The thought hit him so hard that he felt breathless and dazed for a second, as he listened to Kara sing the last few notes of the song, her voice echoing throughout the karaoke bar._

Oh, I wanna dance with somebody  
I wanna feel the heat with somebody  
Yeah, I wanna dance with somebody  
With somebody who loves me

 _The song ended slowly, with the last note stretching out for a couple of seconds before fading out, yet even then the world didn’t come into focus for Mon-El. All he could do was stare at Kara, at this beautiful, kind, and talented woman, and he couldn’t help thinking just how_ right _this felt. He’d never really thought he could find love on either the Bachelorette or the Bachelor, yet somehow…it’d happened. It seemed like Winn had been right all along. As long as the right person came… Anything could happen._

_He heard the other girls beginning to clap slowly, he watched as a smile spread on Kara’s face, yet all he could do was staring at her, mesmerized. He was truly mesmerized, and he was hoping that, even though he couldn’t move his hands to clap, she saw on his face how much he loved the performance. How much he loved her, even though he couldn’t voice those words just yet._

_Their eyes met right after hers swept around the room, and from the way her face literally lit up, he assumed that she truly could read his face. At least to some extent. She dropped her hands from the microphone and stepped back, ready to leave the stage. He didn’t let himself think about how the action would be seen as he jumped to his feet._

_“Wait. Kara, wait.” Her steps halted at his breathless words. She looked up at him, just in time to see him snatch the rose from the tabletop right in front of him and step towards her. He didn’t miss the way her eyes widened. “I want to give you something.”_

_He could hear the girls behind him murmur, some complaining—he was pretty sure they claimed he was giving Kara an unfair amount of attention—yet he was beyond caring. He loved Kara._ He loved Kara _. How could he_ not _be unfair? It would always be Kara for him, and no one in the show can change his mind. The connection he felt with her… It was unlike anything else. And it wouldn’t go away. There was no point in trying._

_“Mon-El…” he heard Kara whisper as he stepped right in front of the stage. It was a little bit higher from the ground, so he had to lift up his chin to look at Kara’s face, yet he didn’t even care. He could feel his heart slamming against his ears as he gulped._

_“You were amazing,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotions. “You were…amazing, Kara.” He honestly couldn’t find other words to explain it. He thought that maybe this was way too much honesty for a group date, or even for something on camera, yet he didn’t care. He didn’t care about anyone but Kara right now. He couldn’t see anyone but her._

_She could barely offer him a shaky smile. “Thank you,” she croaked, yet even then her gaze was fixed on the rose. The rose that he was clutching tightly in his hand. Somehow… Now that he’d actually realized the depth of his feelings for Kara… The rose meant so much more than the previous roses he’d given her—and she did get all the other group date roses, so it was saying something. Yet this time… This time he was sure. He had no doubt in his mind that when the show ended, it’d be Kara standing with him, it’d be her he said his “I love you” to, it’d be her he proposed to. It’d always be her._

_He lifted the rose into the air right in front of them, hoping it wasn’t shaking so much from his trembling hands. He cleared his throat. “Will you accept this rose?” Even before he could ask the question Kara was smiling and nodding, stepping forward to get down from the stage and wrapping her arms tightly around him. He reveled in being in her embrace, just having her in his arms, not being able to stop thinking just how real this was. They were in the middle of a reality TV show, in which he had to date a bunch of girls, yet still it felt like the realest thing he’d felt in his life. He never felt like this for anyone else. Maybe it was the rush of the situation or the extravagance of the show, but…maybe it was just them belonging together. Because it wasn’t the extravagance that he loved about her, it wasn’t the overly expensive dates or gowns or roses or traveling that he loved, it was the little moments he got to spend with her. It was holding hands with her and walking down the street. It was laughing at a joke she’d made and trying not to spurt out his wine. It was dancing with her in a private little concert after their one-on-one date. It was hugging her and cuddling with her and talking to her, it was just being in her presence. It was watching her sing, letting her beautiful voice wash through her._

_He loved her._

_He didn’t let himself thing about anything else but her as he handed her the rose, holding her hand, and leading her to the backstage of the karaoke bar for their short little private time and a surprise prepared for her. He didn’t let himself think what other girls would perceive this—how he seemed to favor her over everyone else. He didn’t let himself think whether this was selfish or unfair. He didn’t think anything that felt this good could be unfair anyway. This was about him and her, this was about them and not anyone else._

_And if people did think that this was all unfair and he should be more open to others… They could think that. It didn’t change his feelings. It didn’t change how happy he felt with Kara. And it also didn’t change how grateful he was that he got to enjoy this short, private moment with her, singing just to her with a guitar in his hand—he really couldn’t have guessed how well it would work out, but somehow he’d managed to choose the most appropriate song for her:_ Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic _—watching the awe and happiness shining all over her._

_He could stay here forever._

* * *

Mon-El’s vision was so blurred because of his tears that he could barely see the photos in front of him. Yet still, he couldn’t let go of the album. He held it tightly on his lap, his fingers blindly tracing over the photos, as if keeping them close would somehow bring her back. Somehow he would have her by his side, and he wouldn’t feel so damn _lonely_ all the time. Even his apartment felt too empty, even though he’d been living in it alone for a couple of years ever since Eve and Winn moved in together.

“I miss you,” he whispered to the album, wrapping his arms around it and pulling it to his chest. “I miss you so much, Kara.” He probably didn’t get to feel that way, since _he_ was the one that let her walk out of his life when she told him she loved him, but it was hard to think that when he couldn’t even properly breathe. A silent sob escaped his mouth as he ducked his chin and rested his forehead against the side of the album.

And he wished, for not the first time in the last couple of months, that he’d said something to Kara. That he held onto her…instead of letting her go.

* * *

_Mon-El was looking outside from his hotel room to the beautiful canal right outside the window while he sipped his coffee. There was a smile on his face that seemed to have plastered there forever—and no, it wasn’t about the overnight date he had with Fleur the previous night. It was about the date he had_ before _with Kara; just a day of walking around the city, doing a bit of shopping, relaxing and enjoying the company of each other. Just like a normal couple would do. It was nothing too extravagant—though granted, none of his one-on-one dates with Kara had been extravagant. And he liked that better too. It…minimized the “TV show” quality of everything, instead making him feel like this was real life and he was with his girlfriend._

_Though he had to admit that the bungalow they stayed by the sea for the night looked like it almost jumped out of a fairytale, with Kara being the princess—his princess. Or the queen, as she might’ve argued if she ever heard him say that. He smiled even with the cup of coffee to his lips before sighing. He felt…contented. More than contented. He felt happy—truly happy, for the first time in a long time. He didn’t feel lonely anymore. He had Kara. And at the end of this, he’d propose to her, sealing their relationship forever and moving forward to a life together. He couldn’t actually believe that what Winn had always claimed worked—that he found love on the Bachelor of all places—yet he didn’t care. He knew that Kara was the one for him, no matter where they’d met each other._

_He assumed that the journal sitting on the counter next to him, one he’d been writing his proposal speech down to, was a proof of that. He knew it would be Kara for him at the end. He’d known it for some time actually, yet couldn’t really voice it as… At the end of the day, this was a reality TV show that needed ratings, and he was expected—and obligated—to meet up to some expectations. Yet if he was allowed, he’d pick Kara right now, he’d tell her that he loved her, and they could run off to the sunset together and live happily ever after and all that stuff._

_Yes, he knew that sounded cheesy—like, rom-com on steroids cheesy—but oh well. Technically this could still be counted as the “honeymoon phase” of his relationship with Kara. He was allowed to be cheesy._

_He put his coffee cup to the counter to grab his journal, wanting to go over the proposal speech once more—you could never be so sure—when he heard a knock on the door. He frowned. He didn’t have a date today, as far as he remembered at least. His date with Dana was in two days. He was pretty sure of that._ Pretty _sure._

He grabbed the cardigan that he draped behind his chair and threw it around his shoulders before he moved to the door and opened it. The first thing he noticed was the camera crew standing a couple of steps away from the door, with a microphone dangling right over the door. The second thing he noticed was—

_“Kara?” He frowned as he looked at the blonde, her head bowed, so much so that he couldn’t see her face through the curtain of hair. Her hands were tucked into her behind pockets as she lifted her chin, and… Mon-El felt air getting caught in her throat. Because the girl standing in front of her… It wasn’t the happy, bubbly Kara that he knew. It wasn’t the girl that liked to hold his hands and play with his fingers. It wasn’t the girl that playfully tugged him close and stole kisses from him. He’d seen a lot of sides of her throughout the show, from being happy to being content, from laughing to furious, yet he’d never, ever seen her cry._

_Yet right now she was crying right in front of him, her cheeks tear-streaked, her blue eyes shining deeply with the glimmer of tears. He felt something crack in his chest at that._

_“Oh my God…” he gasped, trying desperately to get himself together and help her through whatever had happened. She must’ve needed him so badly to come here; she didn’t like stirring any kind of drama or overstepping her bounds. And from only that he knew this was important._

_Kara didn’t beat around the bush before jumping into the topic. “Can we… Can we talk?”_

_Mon-El felt his blood go cold with those words._ Nothing good ever comes after that.

_He nodded almost hastily, grabbing the doorknob tightly to keep himself together, and stepped back to let Kara in. He felt numb following her to the couch in his room, watching her settle down before he sat down himself right next to her, so much so that their knees were brushing each other’s._

_And despite everything—despite dreading what Kara was about to say—he reached forward to take her hands in his, offering her his comfort. Because no matter what… She was sad, she was crying, and all he truly wanted about everything else was for her to be happy._

_Yet still… Even that thought couldn’t stop the fear from churning in his stomach._

_Kara parted her fingers to let him lace his through them as she leaned into his touch, as if she needed his comfort, as if she needed him to be there for her. He leaned forward as she quickly wiped away a tear with the back of her free hand._

_“Are you okay?” His voice sounded so hoarse that without the mics, he doubted the cameras would be able to record it. Even though they were literally settled right in front of him and Kara, filming every single moment. He couldn’t help wishing that they could have some private moment, without anyone else, to sort this out, but… He knew he wouldn’t get it, no matter how much he begged. He just had to suck it up._

_“No,” Kara answered his question with a small but humorless laugh. She shook her head and wiped another tear away. Still, they seemed to be continuously streaming down her cheeks, wetting them all over again._

_He couldn’t even ask what happened—he didn’t feel brave enough to hear the answer—before she continued. “I just got a call from…from my mother. My dad and sister… They’d gotten into a car accident.” Mon-El felt his stomach drop even with just that sentence, because he could see so very clearly where this was going now—downhill, and fast._ No _. “They were immediately taken to a hospital but still… The doctors were saying that it might be too late for them.”_ No… Please, no _. “They said that…that they might never wake up. Mon-El, they might…” She couldn’t even say the last word as her voice trailed off and a silent sob escaped her lips. Yet still, all he could think about was no. No, this…this couldn’t be happening. Not right now. It must’ve been a…a bad dream. A very, very bad dream. She couldn’t…go away. She couldn’t leave the show. She was the one for him. She’d always been the one, from the beginning._ How _could she walk away just…just like that?_

 _Granted, it wasn’t_ just like that _and he knew it was so_ selfish _for him to want her to stay in this situation…yet he still dreaded the thought of her leaving. He’d always dreaded it—that she didn’t love him back like he loved her, that she’d realize that eventually and leave, that he’d lose her…forever. He dreaded that. And now…as if the universe wanted to make him suffer…she was leaving. She was_ leaving _him._

 _“I can’t stay, Mon-El,” Kara continued with a shake of her head, confirming his suspicions. She was on the verge of sobbing, he could see that, yet he was so distraught, so_ frozen _in fear that he couldn’t say or do anything. He could just stare at her, listening to her words as he held her hands in his limply, numbly. He knew the numbness would pass, though. He knew in no time pain would hit him like a train, rendering him breathless and wounded, bleeding out in the middle of nowhere with no one to save him. Without Kara… Who could save him from that anyway?_

_“I can’t stay and…and let my mom suffer through the possibility of losing her husband and her daughter alone. I can’t stay and not be with my sister and father while they’re dying. I have to be there for them. They’re… They’re all I have.” She stopped to bite her lip. “They’re all the family I’ve left.”_

You have me _, he wanted to say._ You have me, Kara. I’m here for you. I’ll always be here for you _. Yet… How could she know that? According to her, she was one of the last three girls, but she didn’t know for sure that he’d choose her. Even if she_ suspected _she had a higher chance than other girls, even if she thought he’d choose her, he knew she couldn’t risk it. Not when her family’s life was in danger._

_And in that situation… How could he really ask her to stay?_

_“I’m so sorry,” she continued, taking him out of his thoughts as another sob escaped her mouth. She desperately tried to stop them by covering her mouth with her hand, yet it only worked to muffle them. “I’m so sorry, Mon-El.”_

_She broke down then, her shoulders slumping forward, her head bowed so that her hair was cascading around her face, sobs escaping her mouth freely. That got Mon-El to snap out of whatever painful stupor he was in. Because this was Kara. The woman that he loved with all of his heart. And to see her cry like that… It was almost_ _worse than thinking about her leaving him. He didn’t want to see her cry. He never wanted to see her cry._

_“Hey,” he whispered, feeling glad that his voice wasn’t shaking too obviously, as he tugged her close. “Come here.” He removed her hands from her face gently, instead guiding her head to his chest so that he could support her while she cried. And as he thought, she didn’t lose time before she wrapped her arms around him, buried her face onto the crook of his neck, so much so that he could feel her tears wetting his shirt. Yet he didn’t care about that as he wrapped an arm around her and rubbed her back, stroking her hair with other hand and pressing occasional soothing kisses on her head. He wasn’t sure who was shaking more at that point, him or her, yet it didn’t matter. Not as tears blurred his vision too. Not as he had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep himself from crying. Not as he blinked furiously, trying to push back his tears, and tightened his embrace around Kara._

_She would be leaving sooner rather than later anyway. How could anything else matter anyway?_

_“You don’t have to apologize,” he said when he was sure opening his mouth wouldn’t cause him to completely break down in sobs. “I understand. It’s… It’s family.” He felt, more than saw, her shake her head before she pulled back to look into his eyes. It seemed like she gave up on trying to wipe her tears away because she hadn’t even attempted to lift her hands from his chest. Or she just wanted to hold onto him, just as she’d been doing, with his shirt balled in her fists._

_“Mon-El, you have to know… Me leaving has nothing to do with you.” Her voice was shaking so much that it was hard to understand her, yet still he didn’t interrupt, instead letting her sort through her thoughts. He didn’t think what else could he say anyway…at least without begging her to stay or telling her that he loved her. Could he tell her that he loved her? The producers had told him that it was forbidden until the last day but…what if you were sure? What if the one you loved was_ leaving _?_

 _He couldn’t even find an answer to that question before Kara continued. “I would’ve never left if it wasn’t for…this. You know being in this…this journey was out of my comfort zone but…I still stayed for you. I stayed because I believed that what we had was…special. Because I…loved you.” Mon-El felt his breath getting caught in his throat_. It’s the first time she told me that she loved me _._

_His grip tightened on her arms inadvertently as she looked up, her eyes shining as genuinely as ever, even through a veil of tears. “I love you, Mon-El.”_

I love you too _, he thought, almost desperately._ With everything that I have, I love you. I love you. Please don’t leave me. Please. Stay with me _. Yet… She didn’t have a choice, did she? She had to leave, and…that was the saddest part of it all. She loved him and he loved her, and yet…it wasn’t the right time or place. He couldn’t believe how something that felt so_ right _could’ve happened at such a_ wrong _time, but… That was the thing with him, wasn’t it? Whenever he_ _thought he could be happy, whenever he thought he wouldn’t lose it, the rug was pulled right from underneath him. It was as if the universe didn’t want him to be happy. To find even a semblance of happiness._

 _No, it was even worse than that. It gave him a glimpse of that happiness, a_ promise _of it…only to take it away just as he began to think it’d last this time._

_He pulled her close when he felt tears brimming in his eyes to keep her from seeing that. He shut them to desperately push those tears back, yet it wasn’t working. He moved his hand up her back, running his fingers through her hair to push them away, and pressed a kiss right next to her ear. The words left his mouth without his intention._

_“Eres la única para mi.”_ You’re the only one for me.

_He didn’t know why he said it. Kara didn’t even know Spanish. But… A part of his brain was so fixated on the fact that he was on a TV show—though granted, the cameras always jammed into his face didn’t really help—that he thought he couldn’t let her understand what he was saying. He couldn’t let her know that he was in love with her, no matter how much he wanted. That it was her, only her, no one else._

_Yet, he assumed as the mics caught his words, there’d be fans out there understanding his words and their meaning. Yet that was so far off in the future that he couldn’t even focus on that. All he could focus on was now and…and the fact that he was losing Kara. He was losing the woman that he loved._

_He suddenly felt cold when Kara pulled back, confusion tinting her eyes, yet she didn’t say anything. She only stared at him, searching his face, as if she was trying to memorize him. Burning him into her memory so that she would never forget him. He didn’t even need to do that, though. He knew he would never forget her._

_She was his soulmate. How could he forget his soulmate?_

_He shuddered as he moved his hands onto her arms, trying desperately not to fall apart. “I’ll… I’ll just walk you out.”_

_He was surprised that he could even get the words out._

_The numbness had spread all over him as he stood up, walking to the door and outside hand in hand with Kara. He could barely even hear the cameras shuffling around. Yet still he held onto her hand tightly as if it would change anything, as if it would make her stay, as if he wouldn’t lose her if he held her just tightly enough._

_But of course it didn’t work, and soon enough, they were in front of her limo. He had no doubt that her stuff was stashed inside the trunk. He stared at the car for a couple of seconds, trying to wrap her mind around everything, before he turned to Kara. The love of his life…leaving._

_She looked up too, as if she felt him look at her. Pain had pulled her lips into a thin line. A part of him had expected her to just let him go and get into the car, but she was still holding onto him, she was still looking at him as if even the thought of leaving hurt him physically. “Mon-El, the remaining two girls…” she started, forcing the words out. “They’re amazing. They’re both so nice and kind, and…they can both make you happy.”_ But I want you _, Mon-El thought, yet he couldn’t voice those words._ I don’t want them. I don’t love them. I love you _. “I hope you find your happiness with one of them.”_

_And that was the last straw. Mon-El couldn’t stop himself as he stepped forward and took her face in his hands, leaning forward to press his lips on hers. It wasn’t a slow kiss, per se. It was desperate, helpless, passionate, painful. It was a goodbye kiss, one that nobody liked, one that would send viewers of a TV show or movie into a fit of croes. Mon-El wanted to cry too. He wanted to cry out that he loved Kara, he wanted to scream at the unfairness of it all, he wanted to plead her to not leave him._

_Yet he pulled back then, and the bubble of emotions around him dissipated. He blinked his eyes open to find Kara staring at him, her eyes still filled with tears, her hands holding onto his shoulders._

_She stepped back too soon. “Goodbye,” she whispered before getting into the limo, not even letting him say anything. He doubted he could speak anyway._

_He heard the car start in front of her, and then…she was gone. Just like that she left the show, left him, left everything they could’ve—should’ve—would’ve—had together._

_He couldn’t feel anything as he walked back into his house minutes later. Or maybe it was hours. He wasn’t even sure. All he knew was that the joy, happiness, and drive he was feeling that morning were gone. All drained out of him. He didn’t even care that the cameras were following him, he didn’t care they got inside his room before he pushed the door close, he didn’t care that there was a camera jammed into his face as he stood in the middle of his room. At least… At least until his eyes fell onto the journal over the counter. The journal…with the proposal to Kara written_ _inside. The promise of a future of him and Kara, together._

_What a bunch of lies that had been._

_Emotions that had been kept at the side so long slammed into him so suddenly that he felt dizzy for a second. Anger, pain, loneliness, heartbreak, all of it. They were churning in his stomach, coursing through his body, so much so that he found himself shivering._

_He didn’t think as he moved. He grabbed the journal from the counter and threw it to a wall with a scream. He hated it. He hated all of it. He hated this stupid hotel room. He hated the cameras around him. He hated being on this damn show that offered nothing but a heartbreak. Winn and Eve… They were an exception. They_ _managed to make it work out somehow. But he… Of course he’d only get heartbreak from it. Of course he’d only get hurt at the end._

 _He’d lost Kara._ He’d lost Kara _. He honestly couldn’t think of anything worse happening to him right now._

_The first sob escaped his mouth without his intention. He tried to stop them. He pressed his hand on his lips harshly, yet it didn’t work. It wasn’t working. All he could see was Kara in front of him, saying goodbye to him, leaving to never come back. She’d left…and he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t even know how he could finish the show._

_But even that was a secondary concern at this point. All he could focus on right now was the pain of losing Kara._

_He leaned on the wall of his room when his knees felt weak, and slowly he sat down on the floor, wrapping his arms around his knees and pulling them closer. He was shaking all over with the sobs wrecking his body, making his lungs burn, making his cheeks wet, yet still he couldn’t stop crying. He almost welcomed the pain in his lungs. At least it was a distraction from the pain in his heart._

_He didn’t know for how long he’d been crying when he saw someone kneel down next to her. One of the producers—Elle, if he wasn’t wrong. He could barely see her face from his tears, but he felt it when she put her hand over his shoulder. She rubbed it almost soothingly. He could see that his lips were moving, indicating that she was saying something, yet the ringing in his ears muffled all the voice around him._

_Because of that he might’ve had interrupted her mid-sentence. But it wasn’t entirely his fault. He had to get the words out…as if it could help the situation._

_He leaned onto Elle for at least a semblance of support, even though he’d very much rather having Kara by his side. “I loved her,” he whispered his voice almost unintelligible with his sobs._

_“I loved her.”_

* * *

_Mon-El couldn’t breathe. It wasn’t from the lack of trying, as he’d stood in front of a mirror for about five minutes trying to properly inhale and exhale, since he_ knew _he’d be struggling to breathe when the time for the…the rose ceremony came. And he’d truly thought he had things in control…_

 _Until he started walking to the rose ceremony location, and suddenly he felt dizzy. He didn’t know how he was going to do it. He didn’t know how he could get through it, especially if he couldn’t even get through the overnight date with Fleur. He left her about one hour into the date, as rude as it was, because he couldn’t take it. It was either leaving or bursting into tears, opening up about just how much he loved Kara and how she was always the one for him. And…he suspected that_ that _wouldn’t go down well._

_He was trying. It wasn’t as if he wasn’t. He was trying to see himself with Fleur or Dana, he was trying to imagine a life with them, yet every time he pictured his future it was Kara with him, standing by his side. No one else. And… He just didn’t know how he could choose from one of the two remaining girls when that was the case. It wouldn’t be fair for them, and not only that, it wouldn’t work out. Ever._

_Yet…did he really have a choice? If this show was about falling in love, he would’ve chosen Kara already, he would’ve told her that he loved her, and they would be riding off to the sunset together. But…it was a TV show. And really, the majority of what was happening here was staged by the producers to bring in more viewers. The love was real, Mon-El had no doubt about that, but the other things…the drama…the rules…even the dates to some degree… They were all manufactured to increase the ratings. It was a miracle that he’d really fallen in love with Kara in the first place._

_But he did…only to lose her, because he was so scared of overstepping his bounds in this damned TV show. If it wasn’t for that, he’d have opened up to her already, especially when she told him that she loved him._ She loved him _, and he loved her, and in real life, that would be enough for them to get together. But… TV didn’t work like that. And instead he was forced to say goodbye to her, because he was on a damn show and everyone expected him to make it to the end and propose to someone._

_As if he could do that. As if he could choose anyone but Kara._

_He blinked furiously to get rid of the tears in his eyes as he looked at rose ceremony setting. He could see two roses resting on a stool in the middle of the room, and the two remaining girls waiting for him…without Kara. Because she wasn’t there. The only girl he ever wanted to give a rose to was_ gone _._

_He felt something crack in his chest with that thought. He didn’t even know how exactly that was possible, since his heart was bleeding out, yet still…_

_“If you’re ready… Here’s Mon-El.” Maxwell Lord’s—the host of the show—voice took him out of his thoughts. He took a deep breath without even feeling it and forced himself to walk, right next to the stool with two roses, feeling like he could fall apart any second. He didn’t even have it in him to act like nothing was wrong._ Everything _was wrong._

_He didn’t know how he started talking, but finally he managed to clear his throat and lift his head from the roses. Pain was churning in his stomach as he looked at Fleur and Dana, his eyes desperately looking for the other girl he wished with all his heart he could see. Yet…her spot was empty, and from the confusion on both girls’ faces, he knew that they didn’t know about Kara’s departure._

_It felt like a knife was twisting in his stomach when he opened his mouth. “As… As you can see, there’s only the two of you left in this…this journey.” He struggled to find the right words to say, because honestly, he couldn’t handle it if he had to refilm this. “This week… Kara had to leave the show. I had to say goodbye to her.”_ I loved her and I lost her _, he couldn’t help thinking, but he couldn’t voice the words. He stared at the roses on the stool, playing with the stem of one of them just to distract himself. “It was…unexpected for me, so I… I’m sorry if I came off as rude. I’m sorry if you felt like I wasn’t paying enough attention to you, because… You deserved better. And…Fleur…” He looked up only then to look at the brunette girl, whose face looked so cold that guilt added into the mixture of emotions he was feeling. “I’m sorry I cut our date short. It wasn’t anything to do with you, it was…it was me. It was all my fault, and I…I’m sorry.”_

_He didn’t miss the way she snorted and ducked her chin at that. Well, he guessed that was an appropriate response._

_He opened his mouth to explain why Kara had left and what she said, hell maybe even how he felt, yet he couldn’t do it. If he started talking…he was afraid that he couldn’t stop. That he’d say something he shouldn’t have—or should’ve, really. Because he should’ve told Kara how he felt. He should’ve damned the show, damned the consequences, and confessed his feelings. He could’ve been with her, but…he lost her. He let her go._

_Tears filled his eyes at that. He desperately tried to blink them away and reached for the first rose. It wasn’t as if he had to think about to whom he would give it to—there were only two girls and two roses. Yet as he lifted the flower from the stool with shaky fingers… There was only one name playing on his lips. One name he wanted to say. One person he wanted to be with…and she wasn’t here._

_She’d left._

_He didn’t even know how it happened, he didn’t even feel it, but the rose fell to the ground without his intention. He felt the first couple of tears escaping from his eyes, blurring his vision, making him feel dizzy all over again. It was a miracle he didn’t fall down. Yet still, he knew one thing._

_He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t go on. Not without Kara. She was the only reason he’d made it this far, she was the only reason he believed this could actually work. And… Now that she had left, who could expect him to stay? How could he stay?_

_“I’m sorry,” he whispered, shaking his head and stepping back. He could feel the girls looking at him with confusion, even though he couldn’t really see them. “I can’t do it. I’m sorry.” And then he whirled around, almost running away from the rose ceremony._

_He wasn’t planning on coming back._

* * *

Mon-El slipped away from the memories when he heard a knock on the door. And from how harsh it was, he’d assumed that the person—whoever it was—must’ve been knocking for at least some time. Sighing he stood up and went for the door, with the photo album still clutched on his side.

He didn’t forget to wipe away his tears before he pulled open the door…only to come face to face with a grinning Winn. He almost groaned— _almost._ Not that he should be surprised, really. Winn tended to come to his house whenever a Bachelor episode aired the previous night, _even_ if there was basically no Kara in it, just knowing how badly they affected Mon-El.

“Hey, buddy,” Winn cheered, spreading his arm as if he had nothing to worry about in the world. Mon-El bowed his head with a huff and pinched his nose.

“Winn—“

“I knew you’d be all sad and gloomy today,” Winn interrupted him, walking inside the house before he could even pull back, “so I thought I could come by and cheer you up! I mean, who can say no to a cold bottle of beer and some action-packed, 105% platonic movie, huh?” Mon-El turned around to see him waving a DVD in the air. At any other day, it might’ve made him laugh, but right now all he wanted was to crawl into a corner and contemplate about how he turned his life into this lonely sad mess.

“I’m really not in the mood, Winn—“ he started, but before he could even finish the first sentence his friend rushed forward.

“Bup, bup, bup, bup, bup. No. I’m not taking no for an answer.” He dropped the duffel bag in his hand to the floor—seriously, why did he bring a duffel bag anyway? “We have a lot of time before we even have to go to the airport, let alone board the plane. You wouldn’t want to sit around, doing nothing until then, right?”

Mon-El couldn’t help frowning. “…the plane?” He didn’t remember a plane. He couldn’t have forgotten something like that, right? Yes, he _had_ a week off from work, but he was planning to spend that time wallowing in self-pity.

A cheeky smile appeared on Winn’s face. “Right. I forgot to tell you. I… _might’ve_ gotten you a plane ticket…to National City.” Mon-El felt his blood go cold. _No._ “You know, I was so sick of seeing you crying every single day, wallowing in your self-pity and loneliness.” _No, I can’t._ “So I decided to do something about it.” He stopped for a second, as if to get a bigger impact. “You’re going to National City.”

“No.” Mon-El fervently shook his head. “No, I’m not.”

“Yes, you are. Mon-El—“

“No. Winn, I can’t. I can’t go there. I can’t face—“

“You can. Mon-El—“

“No, I—“

“Mon-El.” Winn stopped him by stepping forward and putting his hands on his shoulders. Mon-El could feel himself struggling to breathe, especially when he saw all humor leaving his friend’s face. And you knew something serious was up when Winn wasn’t humorous. “I know you’re scared to face her. I know you think she might’ve moved on from you, and that she doesn’t love you.”

 _You have no idea,_ Mon-El couldn’t help thinking. He’d let Kara walk away. He’d let her leave the Bachelor without telling her how he felt about her. And she probably didn’t even _know_ that he didn’t choose anyone. It would make sense for her to move on if she thought he was with someone.

Just because _he_ couldn’t move on didn’t mean _she_ couldn’t either.

“And I get that,” Winn continued, taking him out of his thoughts. “You don’t want to lose her. Again. But Mon-El… You don’t even _have_ her right now.” Mon-El felt like someone stabbed him in the chest as he shut his eyes. “I mean… You’re not even yourself. You rarely smile or laugh, you only _pretend_ to be happy most of the time, and every single spare time you have you spend on that couch, with that stupid photo album in your hand.”

It was an effort not to wince at those words.

“And frankly, I’m _sick_ of seeing you like this. Besides, basically the whole America wants you two to be together. It would be really weird if Kara wasn’t in that crowd.”

Mon-El’s eyes snapped open. “How do you know that?” he asked hoarsely. A small smile pulled Winn’s lips as he shrugged.

“I might’ve done a little digging to find Kara’s address. It wasn’t that hard, though. The girl has like 400 thousand followers.” Mon-El’s brows shot up. “Oh, and you cannot believe the amount of fanpages there are for you two. It’s like you’re a movie couple or something. They even call you Karamel, or sometimes Danthews, though I did hear the first one more often.”

“We were on a TV show,” Mon-El reminded him dryly, almost absentmindedly. He still couldn’t wrap his mind around what Winn was saying. He…never really looked online for Kara. He was just… He was too scared for it. Too scared to be tempted to go see her, only to have his heart broken again. Not seeing her at all seemed like the better alternative. But now… Winn was offering him a chance to see her. A chance to be with her. And he was…absolutely terrified.

“Winn, what if she moved on?” he asked, running his hands through his hair. “What if she doesn’t want me anymore. I can’t… I can’t lose her again. I can’t live through that.”

“If you don’t go see her now, you’re gonna lose her, Mon-El, and this time it’ll be for good. How would you feel if, in a couple of years, you’d see an article online saying ‘Bachelor star Kara Danvers finally found the one’? And don’t tell me you’d move on by then, because I know you.” Mon-El couldn’t help flinching at that. Winn was right. It’d kill him. Seeing that… It’d kill him. “From what I’m seeing, there really isn’t anything you can lose by seeing her.”

With those words, Mon-El’s eyes flickered to the album in his hand. HIs heart was slamming against his ribs. He could see Kara. That was what Winn was offering him. He could see Kara and…and beg for her forgiveness. Explain how much he loved her, how wrong he’d been to let her leave the show, how he should’ve opened up to her way earlier. He could _be_ with her. It seemed like a small possibility right now just because of his fear, but…he could actually be with her.

And for the first time, he felt a semblance of hope flicker in his chest.

He looked up at Winn, a smile pulling the corners of his lips. “I think I might consider watching that movie,” he said, gesturing at the DVD in the man’s hands. “If there’s time until the plane.”

There was no stopping the grin on Winn’s face.


	2. Reunion

“Are you _sure_ you’ll be fine?” Kara wanted to sigh with Alex’s question as she looked at the red light, waiting for it to turn to green, tapping her fingers lightly on the steering wheel. “I can get off work early today. At least I think so. I can be at your house in an hour if you need.”

“Alex, I’ll be okay,” Kara said exasperatedly, pressing down on the gas pedal when she saw the green light. “Just like the last six times you asked that question, I’ll manage. You don’t need to come to my house every single day.” She made an almost absentminded right turn. “Besides, didn’t you tell me that you had a night shift at the hospital today?” Alex’s answer came a couple of seconds later.

“…I did.”

“And how exactly were you planning on ditching a night shift? Because, correct me if I’m wrong, but nobody really likes night shifts.” She stopped at another red light, biting down a huff. It seemed like even the traffic lights were working against her today, trying to make her life as miserable as possible. As if life wasn’t miserable enough already.

“I don’t know,” Alex had to admit, her voice sounding sad. “But I would’ve figured it out! Nobody can stop me from being there by my sister if she’s crying.” A small smile pulled Kara’s lips at that statement. It was a good feeling, to have someone that would always have your back. But… Alex was a doctor. A cardiac surgeon, no less. She couldn’t just say “screw work” and come to her sister’s side for comfort. Though Kara had to admit, even the sentiment made her feel good.

“I won’t be crying, Alex,” she lied, not wanting to make Alex feel even worse about herself. “I’ll be fine. You have…lives to save. Go save those lives. And I’ll be home, baking myself some chocolate chip cookies, and reading my book with a cup of hot chocolate. A perfect night.” _I wish,_ she couldn’t help thinking. Granted, that would’ve been a perfect night for her merely months ago, but now… She couldn’t help wishing that a certain someone was with her too. And they didn’t have to do crazy things either. They could just sit down side by side and read with their cup of hot chocolates—or coffee for _him,_ because he was a major coffee addict—and she’d be perfectly content with it.

She didn’t know how or when _he_ started being a part of her “perfect life”…but somehow he had. And now, despite not having spent even one minute with him at her house, she couldn’t help picturing him there, making breakfast in the mornings without his shirt on, using her cross-trainer while he watched TV, cuddling up with her on the couch after a long night…or simply just sitting together and talking about everything and nothing. She couldn’t help thinking that that was how it was supposed to be.

But of course _he_ wasn’t there. He hadn’t picked her at the end of the Bachelor. Granted, she had left early…but he would’ve said something if she was the one, right? He wouldn’t have just let her leave.

Her mind reminded her of the words he’d whispered to her ear as they were hugging, words that didn’t make any sense to her until she came back home and plugged them into a translator, but she immediately discarded those thoughts. That was just wishful thinking. Mon-El was probably at his house right now, having the best time of his life, engaged to Dana or Fleur and planning a life with them. He probably wasn’t even thinking about her. She was just…another girl that came on the Bachelor, a girl he might’ve thought he loved, but all of that could’ve changed when she left. It would’ve definitely changed. There was no point in holding out hope.

“Kara?” She slipped away from her thoughts with Alex’s voice coming from the loudspeaker. Shit. She probably had missed something that her sister had said. She was so lost in thoughts that she’d forgotten she was on the phone with her.

“Yes?”

“You didn’t hear any word I said, did you?” Kara opened her mouth to object at that…but what was the point? One question, and Alex would catch her.

“Sorry, I was just…thinking about something. What did you say?”

Alex’s answer came a couple of seconds too late, after a short sigh. “Nothing. Just that…the perfect night sounds nice. You need it.”

Kara really doubted that it was what she’d said, yet she didn’t even have it in her to argue. She was five minutes away from home anyway. From the _perfect_ night.

She bit back a sigh.

“Yeah. I could use some rest.” She looked at the clock. “Anyway, it seems like your ten minute break is coming to an end.”

“You needed to remind me of that, didn’t you?” Kara chuckled lightly at the exasperation in Alex’s voice.

“I just don’t want you to be fired,” she mused. “And besides, what if there’s an emergency case? What if someone has a heart attack like, right now?”

“You know I’m not looking at emergencies Kara.”

“…fine. But still. You need to get back to work.” _And I need some alone time and silence._ Okay, that wasn’t exactly what she needed, but that wasn’t the point. “Love you.”

“I love you too. And… You’ll call me if anything happens, right? If you’re feeling down, or…”

“I will call you. Don’t worry. I promise.”

“Good. Good.” Kara couldn’t help laughing and shaking her head at that.

“Bye, Alex,” she said, pressing the red button on the car’s screen to end the call.

“Bye, Kara.” And then silence fell over the car…well, at least as much silence as one could get at the crowded streets of National City. She made another right turn to the direction of her apartment as she reached to turn on the radio for some music. She couldn’t help it as her eyes flickered to the photo tucked into the corner of the overhead mirror… Well, a screenshot of her and… _him…_ from their first one-on-one night. The memory sometimes made her smile lovingly, remembering just how much fun they had at the massive murder-mystery event he’d planned. It was the first time she’d realized just how well they worked together, despite knowing each other for only two weeks and spending most of that time away from each other. It was then that she truly realized what they had might be something special, especially as they posed for that photo with their murder-mystery certificate in their hand, grinning from ear to ear.

She didn’t even have to force that grin. Despite all the cameras and “fake” reality going on around them…the happiness she’d had that day felt more real than anything she’d done in a long time.

* * *

_“Shit.”_

_Kara muttered a curse under her breath as she almost dropped the coffee cup in her hand onto the floor, trying to get it from the top shelf. It was a turquoise one with a sort of flower pattern on it, and she felt drawn to it immediately. She loved flowers and blue color in general. Sue her._

_Regaining her control over the coffee cup and putting it on the counter, she poured the coffee she’d just made into it. She could feel the chatter of all the girls in the house coming from the living room, yet she ignored them. Because first, she needed coffee to function, and second…there was apparently a new date card there, and she so didn’t want to be there when it was read to whoever had gotten the date. It obviously wasn’t her, so why be there?_

_It shouldn’t bother her, really. Not getting dates. This whole crazy and ridiculous Bachelor thingy was hard, and she was pretty sure that Mon-El wasn’t the only one_ _choosing the dates. Which was ridiculous on it’s own, since… Well_ , he _was the one that was supposed to fall in love, right?_

_But oh well, beyond love and all that crap they used to sell this thing, it was a reality show. Which meant all kinds of fabricated scenes and stirred-up drama and blown-out-of-proportions moments. She wasn’t kidding herself into believing it was just about love. When money came into something… It tainted the intentions, no matter what. Especially in the show business._

_Being a reporter and working under Cat Grant had taught her that._

_So instead she sighed and sat back, hoping she’d get her one-on-one date some time. The group date last week was amazing, and getting the group date rose was just the icing on the cake, especially since she honestly didn’t expect it. She was playing with the edge of her dress, staring at the table next to them, trying to look like she wasn’t interested in the rose at all, when Mon-El called her name._

_She’d never forget the way his eyes were shining and his lips were curled into a smile as he handed her the rose. She was so happy that she could even ignore the jealous remarks of the other girls. Mon-El had chosen her. First the first impression rose, and now this… She’d honestly felt overwhelmed, and a bit surprised, with the bubble of happiness growing in her chest._

_A huge thing for someone who planned to bail out on the first night. She was_ so ready _to claim she’d never be a part of something this ridiculous, and she would never try dating a guy who was dating about twenty other girls at the same time. Not only that, she’d never fall in love with him. And yet… Mon-El somehow succeeded in making an impression on her. He was…different. For the lack of a better word. Different than how she assumed the bachelors on the show would be like. He was…honest. Of course there was a façade quality of the whole thing, but she could see him try to be honest, especially to himself. He wasn’t being all self-righteous and egoistical like any men surrounded by beautiful women might be like. He was honestly trying to work this shit out—trying to survive it without hurting anyone or getting hurt himself. He just wanted to be happy, she could see that. He just wanted to make this go as smoothly as possible._

_Maybe that was why she stayed. Or maybe it was the attention he was paying to her. She might be shy, but she wasn’t blind. She caught him staring at her on multiple occasions, and he made an effort to look for her and talk to her whenever she was around. She wasn’t sure if it was because he was just a kind person, or he was interested in her, but… It was enough that she wanted to give it a shot. She wanted to give him a shot._

_And there was also this fluttery thing her heart tended to do whenever he was around, so…_

_She ran her fingers through her hair and leaned onto the counter, wondering who’d gotten the date this week. It was only second week, so it was anybody’s guess, really. Dana? She and Mon-El seemed really close before the last rose ceremony, and she was one of the first people he handed out the rose to. She knew that meant Dana was one of the “safe” ones. Or…maybe it was Kelsey? Honestly, she wouldn’t really mind that. Kelsey was a nice girl, and she was actually the only one who congratulated her on the group date rose._

_Oh, she really hoped it wasn’t Leslie, though. That girl radiated bitchiness all around._

_And there was this teeny tiny bit of her that hoped it was her. That she’d gotten the one-on-one date. She remembered what he’d said to her right as he was giving her the first impression rose_. And you’re that right person? _she’d asked, as a joke mostly. She honestly thought he’d just laugh it off, but…he didn’t. He’d actually said he wanted to be that person._

Well, I truly hope so. Because I…I want to be that person for you.

_…and if she had to be honest with herself, she wanted him to be that person._

_But she obviously had to resign to going to another group date this week, she guessed._

_“Kara?” She slipped away from her thoughts when a girl appeared at the kitchen’s door—Dana. She pushed herself off of the counter, ready to ask what was going on…until she saw her lift a card in the air and wave it. She felt her heart stop momentarily._

…is that what I think it is?

_“There’s a card for you,” Dana announced, a genuine smile playing on her lips. Subconsciously Kara could see other girls gathering around the door behind Dana—mostly with disappointed expressions, one or two with a sneer—yet all her focus was on the card. The_ date card.

_…she’d gotten the date card. She’d gotten the one-on-one date._

Oh my God.

_She stepped forward in a daze almost, not being able to form any words. Even as she heard Leslie clear her throat. “You got the date, girl,” she almost sneered. “If you ask me, though, it was a pretty lame date card.” And then, pushing the others around, she left the room._

_Kara heeded her no mind, only taking the card from Dana—who was sighing after Leslie—with shaky hands. “…I got the date?” She turned over the card as Dana nodded. She traced the writing._

Wear jeans and a t-shirt. We’ll be getting our hands bloody. ;)

\- Mon-El

_A smile pulled her lips at the words, and she realized now she understood what Leslie meant when she said it was lame. Jeans and a t-shirt probably would sound lame to anyone…but not to her._

He remembered, _she couldn’t help thinking. It’d been more than a week she told him she preferred jeans and t-shirts, and she couldn’t imagine just how many things that he was expected to remember was thrown at him, but… He remembered. And it felt more special to her than any extravagant card would._

_And she found herself really, really excited about the date, even more than she thought she would be._

* * *

She shook away the memory when tears started filling her eyes. _No._ She wouldn’t cry right now. Not only she was driving, and it would be _extremely_ dangerous to have a blurry vision, but she’d have enough time to cry over chocolate chip cookies and hot chocolate at night. She’d just have to hang on for a little bit more. Just a little bit.

Still, she couldn’t keep her eyes from flickering to the passenger seat. And just like always…she couldn’t help wishing that a certain someone would be there for her, to hold her in his arms when she cried, instead of the blanket she desperately wrapped around herself. To wipe away her tears with his soft fingers instead of the harsh tissues she had to use. To whisper comforting words to her ears to suppress the smothering silence of her house and fill the hole in her chest.

But of course…he couldn’t be there. He’d never be there, no matter how much she wanted it. So reaching to the passenger seat, putting her hand lightly on it, or biting her lip to keep herself from crying… It was all for nothing. It wouldn’t change anything.

_Oh, Mon-El, why did you let me leave?_

* * *

_“I can’t believe Leslie could do something like that.” Dana’s whisper took Kara out of her thoughts as she turned to the girl lying on the bed next to her. The hour was way past midnight, yet after the disastrous group date of the day—and she had thought Paris was supposed to be the city of love, not the city of drama—neither her, Dana, nor their other roommate Kelsey felt like sleeping._

_Kara only turned to Dana as Kelsey propped herself up on the bed. “I know, right?” she agreed with a nod. “I mean, I knew the show liked drama and they liked to stir it up, but the things Leslie said…” She shivered with that thought and shook her head. “It was really unfair. Especially after all those chances Mon-El gave her, despite all the shit she’s pulled. I’m really glad that she’s gone now.”_

_“Agreed.” Her eyes turned to Kara. “What do you think, Kara?”_

_“Hm?” Kara lifted her head, trying to focus on the conversation instead of the thoughts milling around in her head. But, in her defense, a lot had happened that day. She couldn’t seem to stop herself from thinking._

_“What do you think about Mon-El sending Leslie home?” Dana explained in a hushed tone, only half of her face illuminated with the night-light._

_Kara couldn’t help grimacing with the question. Not that Leslie hadn’t been at the forefront of her mind, but still, hearing the girl’s name made her feel sick. She could almost hear the words she’d shot at Mon-El without even caring about his feelings. A part of her suspected that it might not be all her, that the producers might have a finger in stirring so much drama up, yet still she seriously doubted they’d make Leslie call Mon-El an “attention-seeking self-righteous fuckboy who always plays the victim”—and if that was the case, then that was really,_ really _rude and unfair of them, because he was none of those things. He was… He was just an innocent guy who was trying to make the best out of a horrible situation. She could see it within everything he was doing: He wanted this to go as smoothly as possible, but he was also trying to be honest with himself, and… Well, when it came to feelings, he really wasn’t that good at hiding them. But none of those was his fault. It wasn’t as if this was a competition in which everyone could get a fair chance. It was love on the line, and a proposal no less at the end of it all. And it was just a natural part of life to love some people more than the others, and to want to spend more time with those you loved. Mon-El was like that. There was no way he could love every girl in the show to the same degree, and it was normal for him to gravitate towards the girls he felt more connected too. She even doubted he was doing it on purpose. It was just who he was._

_“I think Leslie had it coming,” she told Dana, lifting herself up in the bed and pushing her hair away from her face. Dana seemed like she agreed 100%. “I mean… Mon-El is already in such a hard position, especially because how honest and real he is with himself.”_

_“He is,” Kelsey said with a nod. “He doesn’t like faking anything.” Kara shook her head._

_“No, and because of that it’s natural for him to want to spend more time with some girls than the others. It doesn’t make him a jerk. He’s just…trying to find his way through a really uncomfortable situation.” She shivered when she thought of Leslie’s words again._

No _, she’d yelled at Mon-El, just as he was trying to send her home as kindly as possible._ You don’t get to call me rude when you’re the rudest one of us all. You don’t think we know that you prefer some girls over the others? You don’t think we notice just how much more time you spend with them? And yet, still, you keep all of us here, because all that attention…all those girls running after you…it makes you feel powerful. You want that attention, you want all of those girls at your tail, because you’re nothing more than an attention-seeking self-righteous fuckboy who always plays the victim. _And then… And then she’d stormed off, leaving a shaken Mon-El and baffled girls behind._

_Kara couldn’t imagine just how horrible it must’ve been for Mon-El, especially it being in front of the girls_ and _the cameras. She just wanted to go to his side and wrap him into a bear-sized hug, telling him not to believe in Leslie’s words, yet with everyone else around she couldn’t do it. She worried that the show would make her action look like Leslie was right all along._

_That was the last thing she’d want. So the only thing she could do was watch as Mon-El left the group date, not even being in a position to hand out the rose. Granted, he’d come back later, and she ended up getting the rose, yet even then—even as it rested on her bedside table now—Kara couldn’t really feel happy about it._

_“He has a really good heart. Like, genuinely good. What Leslie said was really unfair to him.” Both Kelsey and Dana hummed in agreement. The latter had just opened her mouth to say something…when a knock from their hotel room door interrupted her._

_Kara couldn’t help looking up in surprise. Her brows knitted_. Who can it be at this time of the day?

_A glance shared between Kelsey and her told that the other girl didn’t know it either. She just shrugged as Dana went up to look at the door. Kara watched her as light seeped into the room, and stretched her neck she tried to see what was happening. She couldn’t hear the conversation between Dana and whoever was at the door, yet still, it didn’t take much time for the girl to turn back. She had an_ …amused?... _look on her face._

“ _Kara,” she called for her after closing the door. Kara’s brows inched up. “The producers said that you needed to get dressed and do your makeup. Apparently Mon-El asked to talk to you.”_

_Surprise shot through Kara. It took her a couple of seconds to really wrap her mind around the words_. Mon-El asked to talk to me? _It seemed almost unbelievable._ _In the show, the interactions between the Bachelor and the girls were monitored strictly and they really couldn’t spend any alone time together without the cameras, certainly not in the middle of the night. The producers wouldn’t allow it. And she also doubted they’d just randomly let Mon-El talk to one of the girls if it was just a small request. He must’ve begged for it, pleaded to talk to…her. He wanted to talk to_ her.

_She sensed that this was important even before she swung her legs down the bed. Kelsey and Dana encouraged her to do that—and honestly, she was glad for the two girls. They mostly stayed out of drama and, if Kara was right, they were here for the right reasons—well, at least they weren’t here to get attention, be famous, or stir up drama or something. She felt like they knew the situation was unique and that when it came to love, it wasn’t always fair. Mon-El coming to talk to her probably wasn’t fair either. Yet still, they encouraged Kara to do it, which showed they_ understood _the real meaning of love._

_That of course didn’t make Kara less anxious. Because it was unfair, and she had no doubt in her mind that Mon-El knew it. And she also knew he’d never attempt to see her like this because of that unfairness. He might not be able to help whom he gravitated towards, but that was just a plain fact, and something that the previous bachelors would be shamed about. And yet, still, for him to come and ask for her…_

_It must’ve been serious. It must’ve been really serious._

_Her hands were shaking as she quickly smoothed out her hair_ _and put on a minimal makeup, just something that would look good on cameras but nothing too extravagant_. Does he need something? _she couldn’t help thinking_. Is he sad? Is that why he wants to talk to me—because he wants someone to talk to? Or…it is about me? _Her eyes flickered to her rose_. Can he take my rose away and send me away?

_No, no, he wouldn’t do that. No matter what, Kara believed in the connection they had, and that it was stronger than what most other girls had with him. He wouldn’t just send him away, and he wouldn’t wake up in the middle of the night to say it. This was…something else. Something deeper._

_And she couldn’t help thinking that it was about what happened with Leslie._

_When she walked back into her room, makeup done and pajamas discarded, Dana informed her that the door would be knocked soon, by Mon-El, as she and Kelsey pretended to sleep. And Kara was supposed to open the door, and… Honestly, she didn’t know what to expect after that._

_The knock came a couple of seconds later, making Kara’s heart jump. Her hands were shaking as she reached for the bedside lamp, turning it on, before moving to the door. It took her two tries to open it. She hoped her eyes didn’t look as wide as she felt they did._

_And just as Dana said, Mon-El was standing right outside the door. She felt her heart skip a beat. He hadn’t changed his clothes since the group date, and he looked like he spent the last hour curled up under a blanket, yet still, he looked amazing. And cute. You know, just got out of bed with messy hair kind of cute. The urge to wrap her arms around him and pull him close, just like she felt after Leslie left that group date, came back full force. She had to grip the door handle to keep herself together._

_“Mon-El?” she said in a thin voice. He lifted his head slowly, keeping his hands in his pockets…and Kara felt air getting hitched in her throat. His eyes were tinted red. It was barely noticeable, as if he was trying to hide it, yet she knew what it meant. She knew what it indicated._

_He’d cried._

_Her heart went out to him, even as he licked his lips, trying to gather up his courage before he spoke. “Hey.”_

_“Are you okay?” she couldn’t help asking when he didn’t say anything else. He cleared his throat quickly and nodded._

_“Ye-Yeah, I… I was just…” Kara could almost pinpoint the moment his façade fell apart, from the way his shoulders slumped and a defeated look appeared on his face. Oh God, she really just wanted to wrap him in her embrace. She didn’t care what he was sad about—well, of course she did, but she didn’t care if he was right or not. She just… She wanted him to be okay and happy. He deserved to be happy._

_“I’m not okay,” he confessed a couple of seconds later, his voice starting to tremble by the end. She couldn’t help thinking just how_ vulnerable _he looked as he fixed his gaze on her. “Can we… Can we talk?”_

_She was all too aware of the cameras recording every second of their conversation, and she was all too aware that this would blow out of proportions when the season came out…in probably not a good way. She also knew the smart thing would be to tell him that this would be unfair to the other girls. But… As she looked at his pleading eyes and defeated posture, as she felt the helplessness and desperation oozing out of him… She couldn’t say no. How could she, when he looked so genuinely sad and needed someone to talk about it?_

_She nodded hastily as she stepped out of her room and closed the door behind her. “Yes. Yeah, of course.” She reached forward to take his hand before he could even ask her about it—he was always like that when it came to her. He knew she wasn’t comfortable with being under the spotlight all the time, so he tried to make_ _her as comfortable as possible. He let_ her _lead the relationship, not himself. And he would probably never even ask for her support in order to not put her in a hard position._

_But that didn’t mean she couldn’t offer it._

_He almost looked surprised when she laced her fingers through his, but then he almost melted into the touch and leaned into her for support. She offered him a smile._

_They didn’t speak at all as he led her down the hall to the elevators, or as they entered the hotel’s lobby, or even as they went out to the back to sit on the benches around the pool, right under a cedar tree. Kara was all too aware of the cameras following them around, and she couldn’t help feeling uncomfortable about it, but for Mon-El’s sake she tried to ignore them. She knew they would never be left alone, even if she asked, and he must’ve pulled a lot of strings to have this conversation with her. She didn’t want to blow it up._

_And she really wanted to be there for him through…whatever he was going through._

_He didn’t speak for a couple of moments even after they sat down. He wasn’t even looking at her at first—just staring at the distance, his eyes shining with unshed tears. She scooted closer to him and grabbed his hands that were resting on his lap, holding them to remind him that she was there for him._

_He took a shaky breath only then. “You… You don’t think I’m doing this for attention, right?” he croaked out. Kara’s brows furrowed._

_“What?” she couldn’t help asking, and only then he turned to her. She inhaled sharply when she saw the utter…_ vulnerability _in the gray-blue of his eyes. He swallowed hard before he continued._

_“You don’t think that…that I’m rude, or…or being unfair? Or I’m just…stinging around all these other girls? Because I’m…I’m ruthless and…and a_ fuckboy?” _His words only truly hit her then._ Of course _. Those were the exact things Leslie had called him. Attention-seeking, rude, unfair, a womanizer fuckboy… And it’d shaken him. Damn it, of course it’d shaken him. He was trying so hard to do right by everyone, and having someone call him out that not only it didn’t work, but also he was nothing but a_ jerk _… It must’ve stung. It must’ve made him think that he was a_ horrible _person_.

_She suddenly felt disgusted. Not of him, though. Of Lesli,e for ever making him think his efforts were for nothing. Making him feel bad about himself and what he was doing. Because he was an amazing person. He probably didn’t even realize just how amazing he was._

_“Mon-El, of course I don’t think that,” she answered his question and shook her head. There wasn’t even a hint of hesitation in her voice. She squeezed his hands_ _before she continued. “You are none of those things, okay? I don’t care what Leslie said about you. She was wrong.” She stopped briefly, ducking her chin to get a better look at his face. “She was_ so _wrong.” Her voice came out as only a whisper, yet from the way his eyes literally lit up, she knew he heard it._

_“Really?” he asked in a thin voice, as if he was afraid it was all a lie. Her heart broke for him. He just… Damn, he wanted so badly to be a good guy that it was almost heart-wrenching. He wanted to make everyone happy and not hurt them, not because he_ wanted _to be seen as a good guy but he genuinely cared about everyone, that it was so sad to see someone who didn’t even know him get under his skin and make him feel bad about himself._

_She nodded quickly, flashing him a small smile and caressed his cheek. “I know you, Mon-El,” she reassured him, moving her fingers through the ends of his hair. “I know what kind of a person you are. You are kind, understanding, patient… You try to make everyone happy… Hell, you even worked to break through my shyness to get to know me better instead of just giving up. You gave me a chance to not only be myself and express myself, but you encouraged me to do it. You never tried to change me, or anyone, really.” She turned her eyes to him and arched her brow. “Does that sound like a fuckboy to you?” He almost laughed at that, but he looked so astonished that the sound escaped his lips only as a silent chuckle. Pride flickered in her chest for making him laugh even when he must’ve been feeling shitty._

_Really, she should’ve never thought this would be him sending her home. He was just… He just needed to know that Leslie was wrong. He just needed someone to tell him that Leslie was wrong._

_…and maybe he wanted that someone to be_ her _._

_She slipped away from her thoughts when she saw him frown, his expression turning serious again. “I just don’t want to hurt anyone,” he confessed in a low voice, so low that if it wasn’t for their mics Kara doubted the cameras would catch the audio. “I’m… I’m trying so hard to…to be a good bachelor. To make everyone happy and…and not sideline anyone. But it’s…so hard. Trying to be fair while also following your heart is so hard, because… They usually don’t lead to the same thing.” He stared at her while saying those words, so much so that it made her think that they were somehow about her._

_She quickly dismissed that thought and instead focused on Mon-El. Offering him an understanding smile, she pushed a couple of strands of his hair away from his forehead. “Mon-El, this isn’t some objective competition in which you can give everyone equal chances. This is about who you love and, at the end, who you think you can be together with. No one can or should expect you to care about everyone here equally. At the end of the day… You have to do what’s right by you. You have to follow your heart. It will hurt some people, it will leave some of the girls here heartbroken, but this…this whole journey is about finding love. And you can never truly get there if you aren’t honest with yourself.” She rubbed his shoulder before leaning forward and pressing a reassuring kiss there. When she pulled back… There was no way she could miss the tears that had just filled his eyes. She couldn’t help realizing that they looked more blue than gray like this—deeper somehow._

_Deeper and heartbreaking._

_He turned his gaze from her face to their hands on his lap, his thumb absentmindedly traveling on the back of her hand. “I just don’t want you to think I would intentionally hurt anyone, or that…I’m a bad guy. You are…” He took a deep breath, as if he was weighing whether he should say something or not. Kara hadn’t even realized she was holding her breath until she felt dizzy. “Kara, I don’t want to lose you because of that. I can’t lose you. You are…too important.”_

_Air got caught up in Kara’s throat with those words. Or it was the intensity in his voice, or the honesty in his eyes. It mustn’t have been easy, revealing something like that. Putting himself out on the line. She wondered briefly whether saying what he just said was allowed in the show, but it was too late anyway. Besides, the producers hadn’t really interrupted them, so…_

_But that wasn’t even at the forefront in her mind. As she looked at Mon-El, she just… She just wanted to erase that hopeless look from his face. She wanted to remind him exactly why she’d stayed and hadn’t bailed on the whole thing on the first night. It was because of_ him _and how he made her feel. Because when she was with him… She felt like the most beautiful girl in the world, with her quirks and imperfections, good and bad qualities…_ everything _. She hadn’t felt so…so accepted in her life, ever, and it was all thanks to Mon-El. Thinking that he could ever be a bad guy would be unfair to everything he’d done for her._

_She reached forward before she could think, cupping his cheeks and pressing her lips on his. It wasn’t a passionate kiss, per se. It was slow and deep, it was an expression of gratitude, and a reminder to him just how amazing he was. It’d lasted only a couple of seconds before she pulled back, and yet, still, she felt almost intoxicated._

_She blinked open her eyes, only to find him watching her. She offered him a small smile. “You are important to me too, Mon-El,” she confessed. “So trust me when I say this: There’s nothing in this world that could make me believe that you’re a bad guy. Okay?” The relief and gratitude he was feeling was so palpable on his face that it almost cracked her heart. He gulped and nodded, quickly wiping away a tear that escaped his eyes._

_“Okay. Yeah, I… Okay.” Another tear slid down his cheek. “Thank you.” She chuckled and shook her head._

_“I’m just being honest,” she whispered, right before she moved her hands to his shoulders and pulled him close. She could feel him shaking under her embrace, feel the tears wetting her cardigan, yet she didn’t care about it. She didn’t care if her t-shirt became soaked, or if her makeup smeared, or how this even looked from outside. Mon-El was really distraught, and it seemed like he really needed someone to hold him right now._

_She directed his head to her shoulder and let her bury his face there, stroking his hair, pressing occasional kisses to his temple, whispering soothing words. She let him cry on her shoulder for as long as he needed. He wasn’t outright sobbing—no sound really escaped his lips—yet from the way he was trembling and the wetness she was feeling on his shoulders, she knew just how distraught he was. So she hugged him tighter until she felt him stop shaking, until there was no wetness on her shoulder, until he felt together enough to pull back. She let him decide when that was._

_After all, he’d been there for her and stood by her multiple times this last couple of weeks. It was only fair she was there with him when he needed her too._

* * *

Great. Now she was crying. She knew having a trip down the memory lane wouldn’t be a good idea. Especially after the episode from two days ago… Okay, granted, she only half-watched it, but that didn’t change the fact that it didn’t hurt. It was just…another proof that she’d left the show. That this wasn’t some sort of a nightmare she could wake up from. And boy how much she wished it was a nightmare. She wished she could just wake up someday and find herself in one of the motels she’d stayed throughout the bachelor. She wished she could be with him, or she never left him in the first place, even though… She didn’t have a choice. It was family.

Still, sometimes, when she lied in her bed at night with a pillow clutched to her chest, she couldn’t help wondering how it might’ve been like if she hadn’t left. How it would be if Mon-El chose her and proposed to her. How it would be like to have him here, by her side, so that she wouldn’t have to feel _so damn lonely_ anymore. At those moments she wished she hadn’t left the show. Alex and her father woke up from their coma anyway, merely two weeks after she returned. It wouldn’t be such a big deal if she stayed, right? Everything would be fine at the end.

She knew it was horrible and selfish, thinking like that. She knew there was no way she could know Alex and Jeremiah would be okay. And even if she knew that, she couldn’t very well let her mother suffer through waiting them to wake up all alone. But that didn’t change the fact that Alex and Jeremiah’s car accident cost her Mon-El. It wasn’t their fault, per se, but…it was just a fact.

And when you lost someone you _loved_ , with all your heart… It was hard to think properly.

* * *

_“Swim with me.” Kara slipped away from her thoughts with Mon-El’s words and looked up at him._

_“What?”_

_“Swim with me,” he repeated his request, his fingers sliding up from her hand to her upper arm. She felt herself shiver under his touch, momentarily getting distracted from the conversation, until she pulled herself together. “The sea looks really good today,” she heard him saying then, “and it’s really warm. I could use a bit of fresh…water.” She chuckled at how he struggled with his words…at least until she truly processed what he was asking._

_“You want to…swim?” she couldn’t help asking. He shrugged._

_“Yeah. I mean, we’re on a tropical island literally in the middle of nowhere and have the whole sea to ourselves. It would be a shame to miss this opportunity, wouldn’t you think?” He flashed her an almost mischievous smile—one that always made her heart flutter and her chest tighten. She looked at the sea, the soft turquoise and blue waves crashing to the shore, and realized that…he was right. They were at a secluded tropical island, on a shore that made her wonder whether anyone had really ever came here, with a beautiful sea right under their feet… It really would be a shame not to use that opportunity. And it wasn’t like she wasn’t wearing a bikini—the producers had told her that she’d need it._

_Yet, her brain had never made the connection between wearing a bikini and swimming. She thought they’d be…sunbathing or…walking on the beach…or something. And besides, how would they swim with their mics on anyway?_

_Still, as he looked at Mon-El… She couldn’t find it in herself to say no. He seemed so eager, with that twinkle of hope in his eyes and that smile on his face; she didn’t want to take that from him._

_“Okay,” she whispered with a small nod. “You’re right. It might be a bit of a shame.” She reached for the buttons of her shirt before she changed her mind, trying not to think about how bad she might look on camera with wet hair. She was at least glad that she had waterproof makeup on. The producers had made sure of that._

_The swimming part started to make more and more sense now._

_“I will swim with you.” A grin pulled Mon-El’s lips with those words, a grin that made her feel like her decision was worth it._

_She discarded her shirt onto the picnic blanket and grabbed Mon-El’s hand so that he’d pull her up. He’d already taken off his t-shirt…and she couldn’t help it as her eyes traveled down from his face to his chest, taking in the lines of his muscles—damn it, how did he have muscles like that? She’d seen it before of course, on TV, when Alex had forced her to watch the Bachelorette, but still… Seeing it in real life, inches away from you was different. She felt her cheeks heat up._

_“Like what you see?” Only with Mon-El’s words she managed to slip away from her thoughts and look up. She narrowed her eyes before he could say another word._

_“Shut up. Like you weren’t looking at me.”_

_“I was,” he admitted, as if it was second nature to him. “At least I’m not denying that. You_ are _beautiful.” Despite the almost joking nature of his words, she couldn’t help hearing the deep sincerity behind them, something that melted her heart._

_Damn, how did he manage to melt her no matter the situation? Even when she was supposed to stay mad at him? That was a bad, bad quality._

_She tried to ignore that as she turned to her shorts this time, unbuttoning them and letting them slide down her legs. She stepped out of them, leaning down to put it above her t-shirt…_

_When she felt Mon-El’s arm wrap around her waist. And in a second, after a scream later, she was thrown over his shoulder, her hands gripping his shoulders tightly to not fall down. Her heart was slamming against her ribs—from fear or being so close to him, she didn’t know. She only pulled herself together a couple of seconds later and lifted herself up from his chest._

_“What the hell are you doing?”_

_“Taking you swimming,” Mon-El said nonchalantly almost, yet she could hear his smile in his voice, despite to being able to see his face. She knew that they were already in the ocean when she heard water splashing around his legs._

_“Throwing me into the ocean, more like!” she retorted, biting her lip to keep herself from smiling. He didn’t need to know that she was enjoying this. Because she wasn’t. Nope. Not at all._

_Mon-El’s steps slowed down with her yell, and she felt him shrug. “May be. But you can’t tell me you aren’t enjoying—_ Shoot _.” He suddenly stopped, almost making Kara lose her balance. She pushed back from his chest and slid down to her feet to look at him. “The mics. We forgot our mics.”_

_This time, there was no stopping Kara’s laugh. And as they reluctantly returned back to the beach to give the mics to the camera crew, she promised herself that she’d tease him about this whenever she had the chance._

_She was also sure that it’d make it to bloopers…and weirdly, she didn’t have a problem with that._

_She only shook away those thoughts when Mon-El took her hand in his, this time gently, and led her back into the ocean. She let the cold water slide over her shoulders and skin. And she had to admit that it felt good, especially in the hot air. She let her hair down onto the water, watching the curls create a halo around her shoulders, before turning to Mon-El._

_“For someone who was almost reluctant to swim, you seem like you’re enjoying it,” he quipped, crossing his arms over his chest and arching his brow. Kara scowled and splashed water at him._

_“Shut up. This is nice.” She dug her toes into the sand, feeling the corner of her lips kick up into a smile. “Don’t ruin my nice time.” She glanced at him, only to see that he was smiling before he scooted closer to her, pulling her to his side.  
“I won’t. But… I thought we could do something. Now that we were alone…without cameras or our mics… You know, when it’s just us.”_

_“…Oh?”_

_“Yeah.” He lifted his hand to push away a strand of her hair away from her eyes. Kara racked her brain to try figuring out what he might be talking about. He couldn’t have meant…sex, right? Because she so didn’t want to have sex on camera._

_Yet that wasn’t even close to what he said. That wasn’t close to anything she was thinking of, so much so that it caught her off guard. “I thought that we could maybe…talk.” She gaped at him for a couple of seconds to see if he was being serious. (He was.)_

_“What?”_

_“Talk to me,” he repeated, his fingers drawing an absentminded circle on her waist. He sighed when he saw the confusion on her face and started explaining. “Look, I know you’re not that comfortable talking about yourself, especially in front of cameras. And I get that. It’s perfectly normal to have some things that you don’t want to share with… Well, the whole America, basically. But… I thought that…maybe you’d want to share them with…me?” Kara’s eyes widened as his words finally started to register and she understood what he was talking about. Yet she couldn’t say anything; she could only watch as a blush crept up his cheeks and he scratched his cheek. “Because I want to get to know you, Kara,” he continued. “I want to get to know all of you. I think we have something special here, and I don’t want some cameras to get in between us. So…if you want that too…if you want to share anything with me… You can do that now. The cameras are too far away to hear us without our mics.”_

_Her heart was slamming against her ribs by the time Mon-El finished his words. She stared at him for a couple of seconds, not quite believing that…that he’d prepare all this just to give her an opportunity to have some private talking time with her. And she knew he must’ve gone to lengths for it; the producers wouldn’t just allow them to have their mics off like that. And yet… He’d still done it. He’d done this for her, so that they could talk, so she didn’t have to worry about prying eyes—or cameras in this case—and could speak freely. It was such a sweet, considerate thing that it was hard to wrap one’s mind around it…yet she didn’t even struggle in believing that. Because it was Mon-El. Because he was really that thoughtful and kind. Because he’d do anything for the people he cared about. Because…she loved him. Oh God, she’d totally fallen in love with him._

_And it was a big deal for someone who truly thought she’d leave the show from the first week. But…she didn’t. She’d actually fallen for the Bachelor. It was a scary thought, to love someone that might not love you back or choose you…but that didn’t change her feelings._

_And she realized, in another scary moment, that…she wasn’t that scared. Not when she looked at his eyes, watching her with a hopeful twinkle, waiting for her to say something. Because he was right. They did have something special. She truly believed that they had something special._

_That was why she hadn’t even hesitated as she opened her mouth. “Let’s talk then.”_

_And what felt like hours later, when they finally got out of the water, if she had a huge grin on her face, if she was holding onto Mon-El’s hand tightly, if her heart felt like it was soaring in the sky… It was all thanks to this amazing man walking next to her. The man that she loved, and the man that she wasn’t afraid of loving, despite the situation. He’d given her the best gift he could: an opportunity to be herself. How could she not be happy?_

* * *

Kara could only manage to slip away from the memory when she parked her car. She wiped her tears away, even though she knew there was no way to hide that she’d cried. Damn her light-colored skin and easily-reddening eyes.

She locked her car door and didn’t miss any time as she made her way to her apartment. _Chocolate chip cookies,_ she reminded herself, _and a cup of hot chocolate, and then I can cry._ That was the only thought that kept her from breaking down in the elevator. _Chocolate chip cookies and hot chocolate. Chocolate chip cookies and hot chocolate. Chocolate chip coo—_

She was repeating those words in her mind like a mantra as she turned around the corner in the hallway…and came to an absolute stop. No, it wasn’t because there was some robber trying to break into her apartment. It wasn’t because her next-door neighbor was standing in front of her door with the classic old-lady sneaky smile. Or it wasn’t because Alex was already standing there with a plate of chocolate chip cookies and a grin.

It was because _he_ was standing there—well, more like sitting—with a…a rose in his hand. A rose he was twirling around, watching the petals shine under the dim light of the hallway.

_Mon-El._ It was Mon-El in front of her door.

_Am I dreaming?_

“Mon-El?” The word came out only as a whisper as she stepped forward carefully, afraid that he would disappear if she moved too quickly. Because…he couldn’t be there, right? She must be hallucinating him. Why would he be there, instead of in the arms of…whoever he chose? He should be in the arms of whoever he chose. And yet…

The hallucination didn’t disappear. In fact, Mon-El just looked up, stopping twirling the rose between his fingers. He didn’t do anything at first. He just stared at her, and she stared at him, taking in those gray-blue eyes she loved—and dreamed about—too much for her own good, the red-tinted cheeks and the light scruff she missed caressing, the lips that she imagined kissing every single day and night… The lips she could still feel on her lips even after months later, especially when she woke from a dream in which she was with him, the ghost of his kiss still lingering. He was there. _He was there._

She still couldn’t wrap her mind around it as he scrambled to his feet, almost dropping the rose. The first thing she noticed—once she managed to get a reign on her thundering heart and fluttering stomach—was that he looked striking. Even with his messy hair and pale skin he was the most beautiful person she’d seen in his life. Granted, she might be biased, since she loved him and all…but that didn’t change the sentiment.

The second thing she noticed was that…he didn’t look fine at all. His cheeks were collapsed—like, collapsed enough to warrant worry—there were huge purple circles under his eyes, his jacket was hanging loose from his shoulders, indicating that he must’ve lost weight—she knew how snugly his clothes normally hugged her skin—and his eyes… Instead of being a warm mixture of gray-blue, they looked more of a full concrete color, deprived of all its light and liveliness. He looked anything but happy, anything but how she imagined he would be, being newly engaged and all. Anything but…how he should be.

“I didn’t choose anyone.”

That was the first thing he said, before Kara could even pull herself together enough to think about something to say. She felt her eyes widen.

_I didn’t choose anyone._ That couldn’t mean what she thought it meant, right? That couldn’t mean…

No. _No,_ she wouldn’t think that. Not right now. She couldn’t get hopeful…and get her heart stomped all over. She already barely had herself together. One more blow, and… She was worried that she’d be broken beyond repair.

But before she could even hold onto that thought…Mon-El continued.

“I didn’t choose anyone, Kara.” _No._ “Not after you left.” _Stop._ “I couldn’t.” _Don’t say that._ “I couldn’t go on without you. I couldn’t…do it without you. I left. After you left… I left too.” _Don’t. Don’t say everything I want you to say._

“Mon-El…” she could only whisper, afraid to even blink, to close her eyes and realize this was just a dream when she opened them. Her heart was beating so fast that she could almost hear the beats ringing in her ears, making it hard to hear his words. Or it should be making it hard, but still, his voice cut through every noise and ingrained itself to her mind, filling her thoughts with everything she wanted to have and the fear of losing it all over again.

“I couldn’t stay in the Bachelor without you, Kara.” With that Mon-El stepped forward, closing the distance between them to merely a couple of feet. Kara felt air getting caught in her throat. “You told me I was the only reason you stayed. You were the only reason I stayed too. Only reason I didn’t give up on it.” She could see him biting the inside of his cheek, clutching his rose tightly, as if he needed to hold onto something to keep himself together. He blinked and looked up to push away his tears. “I should’ve realized it before. I’m… I’m so sorry I didn’t.” He looked back at her. “I’m so sorry I didn’t realize that you were the only girl for me. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you just how much I loved you.”

Air left Kara’s lungs at that. _It can’t be true._

“I love you, Kara.”

_You’re lying. You’re lying._

“I should’ve said it before.”

Kara didn’t know whether it was his words that made her snap out of her stupor, or the desperation tinting his voice, but she could finally feel her muscles unfreezing. And she felt a lot of things at the same time that it was hard to distinguish them. There was a part of her that was reveling in his words, that wanted to hear them for so long that now it felt like a dream come true. That part wanted her to throw herself at Mon-El, wrap her arms around his shoulders, kiss him, and scream at the top of her lungs that she loved him too. She loved him, she loved him, she loved him.

But there was another part that was scared as hell. Scared that this wasn’t true, that it was all a lie, that wanted to turn around and run away from him, as far away as possible, to somewhere he couldn’t find her and break her heart again. Because he did break her heart. As much as she loved him, that fact didn’t change anything.

But she didn’t do either of them…kind of. Instead she turned her gaze away from him, feeling her vision blur, and walked right by his side to her door. Her fingers were shaking like hell as she tried to unlock it…and the blurry vision wasn’t helping either. She cursed inwardly multiple times before she finally managed to get it open and rushed inside, slamming her hand on the wall to turn on the lights.

Even the familiar environment of her apartment wasn’t enough to calm her. She could still feel her heart stuttering with the overwhelming emotions, she could still feel the ever-tightening knot lodged in her throat, and she could definitely feel the tears streaming down her face.

Yet still she didn’t close the door…giving him a chance to follow her. She didn’t know what she’d do if he followed her—granted, she didn’t know what she’d do if he didn’t do that either—yet still…she left the door open.

She heart his footsteps merely seconds later, while she was trying to take deep breaths to calm herself down.

“…Kara?” he called for her softly. Almost too softly.

She didn’t think as she whirled around. She just acted on instincts. “Are you real?” She didn’t even care about how ridiculous that question sounded, or how Mon-El blinked with surprise. She had to know. She couldn’t take this being another dream.

She watched as his face twisted in pain. “Yes,” he whispered shakily. “I’m real. I’m here.”

_He was here._

Relief washed over her like the warm rays of sunshine. “Good,” she whispered with a nod. “Good, because…because I couldn’t take it if you were a dream again. I couldn’t take it if I did this and lost it again.”

“Wha—“ She didn’t even give him a chance to say anything as she moved forward, taking his face in her hands, and pressing her lips harshly on his.

The kiss was dizzying. Intoxicating. Those were the two words Kara could first think of. Feeling his lips on hers for the first time in _months…_ It was like jumping out of a plane, and feeling free and alive even as rushing air bit into your skin and the ground came closer and closer. It was like diving into a lake in the middle of winter, feeling cold and hot all over, feeling like you were about to die but also you haven’t been more alive. It was like getting that acceptance letter from your top choice college, thinking that you did it, you did what you set out to do, you finally got what you wanted. _She’d_ finally gotten what she wanted with Mon-El. A love that she’d been looking for her entire life; not consuming or toxic but soft, gentle, loving, caring, supportive…unending. It was unending. And she knew that, because if it was something temporary, losing him could’ve never hurt that much.

But now she had him back. She actually had him back.

She was breathless by the time she pulled back and looked up at him, but she could still feel the corners of her lips curling up into a grin. She didn’t stop it. She was holding the collar of his shirt lightly, feeling his hands on her waist, both of them clinging to each other as if they were afraid to let go. She watched his eyes flicker open.

She felt pride filling her chest when she saw that they didn’t look as dull as they had merely minutes ago. She moved her hand to the nape of his neck and brushed the ends of his hair. “You have no idea for how long I’ve been waiting for that.”

A light, breathless chuckle escaped Mon-El’s lips before he leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers. She reveled in the feeling of being in his arms, feeling his hands move along his back, brushing the ends of her hair and twirling the curls between his fingers. It was…perfect. Much, much better than she could’ve wished for. Much more than she could’ve ever asked.

“I think I might have a bit of idea,” he whispered, and then his lips were on hers again, his arms circling her waist tightly, and all logical thoughts escaped her mind as she let herself go in the sensations of the kiss. She’d missed this. She’d missed it so much that it should’ve been impossible, but she had. And now… She never wanted to let it go.

She pulled back only when she was breathless, feeling like she would burst from happiness or passion if she didn’t put some distance between them. When she said distance, though… She meant as in only between their lips. She wasn’t planning on getting out of his arms anytime soon.

She looked at him, her arms wrapped around his shoulders, and she felt her heart skip with sudden fear. “You love me?” she couldn’t help asking. She’d heard it right, didn’t she? She couldn’t have just imagined it?

Or, at least she hoped so, because… If that was the case, she couldn’t take it. She couldn’t do it without him. She only realized that now, when she had a glimpse of a life _with him._ She didn’t want to live without him, ever again.

A small, almost sad smile pulled Mon-El’s lips. “Yes,” he whispered, without a hint of hesitation in his voice. Kara’s heart started fluttering all over again, not with fear this time though, but with pure happiness. Her lips spread into a smile as well. “I’m sorry I didn’t say it before,” Mon-El continued. “I’m sorry I didn’t say it before you left the show. I was so caught up on regulations and rules that I…I didn’t realize I was letting go of the one person I wanted to be with. I’m sorr—“

“Hey,” Kara interrupted him, reaching up to wipe a tear that escaped his eyes. He probably didn’t even realize he was crying before she did that. “It wasn’t your fault.”

“Kara—“

“I’m not saying you weren’t wrong. You were. But… We were in a very unique and complicated situation. It would be natural for anyone in your position to not know what to do. I understand that.” She ducked her chin to search his eyes. “And I don’t blame you, Mon-El. I wasn’t lying when I said I loved you. Just one mistake isn’t going to change that.” She wasn’t even sure if he was breathing or not when she flashed him a smile. “I love you.”

He didn’t do anything for a second, so much so that when he finally hauled her up his chest, a surprised chuckle bubbled out of her mouth. Her hands found their ways to his, wanting to hold them and lace their fingers together—

Until something prickled her hand. She pulled back with the shock of it. “Ow.”

Mon-El’s concerned gaze was immediately on her. “Kara? Are you okay? Did I do something?”

“No, I…” It all started making sense when she saw the rose that was in Mon-El’s hand, the rose that they both had forgotten with the rush of everything. She couldn’t help laughing. “Your rose did. I think it was one of the thorns.” Recognition filled his eyes immediately, and the blush that rose to his cheeks only made her laugh more. “It’s okay, Mon-El. It’s just a prickle.”

Still, he took her hand in his to inspect the wound—which wasn’t even bleeding by the way. He looked back at her sheepishly. “I just wanted to give it to you as kind of a symbol. You know…the final rose.” He scratched his cheek. “I never had the chance to give it to anyone, and if you were there… You’d be the one getting it. So I thought… I mean if that’s okay…”

“Mon-El,” she stopped him before he could get far. How could he think it wasn’t okay? This was… This was more than okay. This was all that she’d ever wanted in the last couple of months; everything she didn’t even dare dreaming of because it was so _beautiful._ And now, having him in front of her, saying the things she’d always wanted to hear… “It’s okay. It’s perfect.” She rubbed his arm and offered him a sympathetic smile so that he could know she wasn’t lying.

He smiled back at her and nodded. She felt something flutter in his chest as he only let her go so that he could lift the rose, his eyes shining with pure happiness. She couldn’t help thinking… This was what she’d been waiting for when she decided to stay on the Bachelor. Not all those fancy trips, not the expensive motels, not the traveling around the world wearing expensive dresses but…this. Being with him at the end, riding off to the sunset together, with their erratically beating hearts and weightless grins.

Granted, they weren’t exactly riding off to the sunset right now, but still… That was just a symbol anyway. A symbol of them…being together.

“Kara Danvers,” Mon-El started, tipping the rose forward slightly to bump it on her nose. A chuckle escaped her lips. “Will you accept my final rose?”

“Yes,” she whispered without even hesitating. _Yes. A thousand times yes._ “Yes, of course I will.” And then she gently took the rose from Mon-El’s hand, holding it tightly to her chest—well, as tightly as possible without the thorns prickling her fingers—before reaching forward and pressing her lips on his again.

She knew the final roses were supposed to be given on a beautiful setting, prepared specifically for that purpose, maybe even under sunset or next to a river or something. She knew Mon-El would be wearing a black suit—maybe with a red tie, just like he did on that first day—and she’d have a beautiful and expensive gown on, provided by the Bachelor’s crew. And she knew there might even be a ring and a proposal involved. It would’ve been beautiful, no doubt; definitely more beautiful than how it was right now, with them being in her house, him having a casual t-shirt and jeans on, her still in her work clothes, yet she realized… She didn’t mind it. She didn’t need all that beauty to be happy. Besides…wasn’t that the point of the whole show? Finding love and being happy?

And at the end, did it matter _where_ that happened, as long as it did?


End file.
